NYWiki:A Postal Event

Episode 9

Foamy tries to find out who smells like crap, and uncovers a terrorist in the process.

Cast (in order of appearance): Germaine, Foamy, Mailroom Terrorist, FBI Agent

Transcript
{Germaine stands at the post office holding a box with the address “to: Satan c/o Hell”}

Foamy: Hey! We've been here quite some time, you know that? Yep been here for like what, four hours? Oh, do I have anything to do? No, don't worry about that! I’ll just sit here and look at the hm... stamps! Yeah, that's right, let me just stare at the stamps! {holds a stamp} Oh this sure is fun! It's more fun than climbing trees and finding acorns. Yep. Wouldn't miss this for the world. Now I’ve got a question. Who is the person on this line that smells so bad? What the hell are you wearing? Is that some kind of weird perfume, or does your body just naturally smell like that? Its fucking filthy! Can't you people just shower? For once in your life pick up a bar of soap and put it under your arms? Be considerate man! I can't stand the funk! {sings} Can't stand the funk! Dikadoo! {speaks} Oh! It's bringing tears to my eyes! {Foamy turns to Germaine.} What are you mailing anyway? Is that like a toy or something? Or are you sending away for something? You couldn't just put stamps on it and put it in a mailbox? Instead you're making us wait here for like six hours! {groans three times} I just want to get home, I got this... there’s this Columbo. Remember Columbo? There’s this Columbo episode coming on. He's this detective and you know he's really smart, and he's got this catchphrase and he's like: {imitates Columbo's voice} Eh, one more question, neh. And he's got this lazy eye, which is really cool. and I don't know whether it's lazy or glass or something, but he's still really smart. You know and he'll find murderers and stuff like that. Maybe I can give him like a case, or hire him for a case And then I can find out who on this line smells like crap! Whoever's on this line that smells, if you just admit you smell I'll take you to one of those cheap ninety-nine cent stores and buy you some soap! {Foamy turns to Mailroom Terrorist, who carries a package with the address "to: Saddam"} What the hell are you mailing, anyway? Is that like a bomb or something? Oh, see? Oh, see? Now everyone’s looking at me! Everybody's looking at me. Ah... ''{FBI Agent's hand grabs Mailroom Terrorist and pulls him offscreen. Various smacking sounds are heard and Mailroom Terrorist cries for help. FBI Agent reaches over and pats Foamy on the head.}''

Foamy: See? He was the filthy one!

{The Ending screen appears.}

Real World References

 * Satan is generally viewed as a preternatural entity who is the central embodiment of evil. Satan is also commonly known as the Devil.
 * Columbo is an American television series about a homicide detective with the Las Angeles Police Department.
 * Saddam was the president of Iraq from 1979 to 2003.