The Loud House Own Episodes: Funny Lincoln

Lincoln thinks he lost his laughter.

Transcript
[Lori is sleeping until Lincoln knocks on he door causig him to wake up]

Lincoln: "Oh, Lori!"

Lori: [opens his window] "What do you want, Lincoln?"

Lincoln: "Time for date with bobby, Lori. Another day, another dollar." [laughs]

Lori: "More like another nickel."

Lincoln: [laughs] "Good one, Lori! [scene cuts to Lori and Lincoln walking down the street and Lincoln is laughing]Another day, another nickel." [laughs]

Lori: "It's not that funny."

Lincoln: "It's funny, because it's true!" [laughs, Lincoln clings on to Lori's legs as they walk into Jean Juan's French Mex]

Lori: "Move over." [flicks Lincoln off his legs and into the kitchen]

Lincoln: [peeks through the kitchen window] "Nickel." [laughs]

Lori: "Grr! Listen, bobby. I just want it to say that I love you."

Bobby: "I love you too, Bab."

[Lincoln is laughing behind him]

Lincoln: "And for another day, another nickel!" [laughs]

Lori: "Grrr!!! It's... not... that... FUNNY! Please make it stop!"

''[Lincoln is running around besides Lori then out of bathroom still laughing. Scene zooms into Lori with a bunch of Lincoln's laughing around his head. Scene cuts to the night he flippin the 'OPEN' sign to 'CLOSED' then walking out of the Jean Juan's French Mex with Lincoln still laughing. Lori enters his house, go upstairs and open Lori and Leni's room then shuts the door in Lincoln's face.]''

Lincoln: "Ok, Lori, see ya tomorrow." [laughs, Scene cuts to morning at the Jean Juan's French Mex]

Bobby: "And always check for spare change, Lori."

Lori: "Awww, Bobby boo-boo bear!"

[Lori kisses Bobby]

Lincoln: "Another day, another... nickel!" [brings food to customer] "2 Burritos."

Customer #1: "Thanks, Lincoln."

Lincoln: "Another day, another nickel."

[all 3 of them laugh]

Customer #2: "Oh man!"

Lori: "He's gone laughing tormentor." [Lincoln continues to laugh but every few seconds, she gets an ache in his side and Lori takes notice of this] "This could be my chance." [enters a table] "Lincoln, you don't look well."

Lincoln: "I don't?"

Lori: "No, Lincoln. You should sit down."

Lincoln: "But..."

Lori: [sticks a cooking thermometer in Lincoln's mouth] "Shh, shh, shh." [feels his forehead] "You're burning up, Lincoln."

Lincoln: "I am?"

Lori: "Tell me, Lincoln, have your sides been hurting?"

Lincoln: "Yeah, a little, Lori."

Lori: "And your temperature is 175 degrees!"

Lincoln: "It's that bad?"

Lori: "Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no. Unless you've been doing a lot of laughing."

Lincoln: "I have been laughing a lot, lately."

Lori: [gasps] "Lincoln, you've got to be careful! You're literally gonna burn out your laugh box!"

Lincoln: "My laugh box?"

Lori: "Yes, it's the part of your body that laughter. If you use it too long without giving it a break, it burns out and you can never laugh again."

Lincoln: "Is that what happened to you, Lori?"

Lori: "Yes. Wait, WHAT?!? NO! Listen, Lincoln. This is serious! If you burn out your laugh box, you live your WHOLElife without ever laughing again!" [In flashback, Luan walking up to Leni]

Luan: "Hey, Leni, you wanna hear a joke?"

Leni: "Sure, Luan."

Luan: "What did the lion say after eating a clown? That tasted funny! [laughs] Get it?"

Leni: "Yeah, I get it."

Luan: "You wanna hear another joke?"

Lincoln: [in a lung capacity machine] "Sure, I'd love a good laugh."

Luan: "What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck!" ''[Leni and Luan laugh normally while Lincoln's laugh is robotic. Leni and Luan walk away with a sigh of disgust]''

[End of flashback]

Lincoln: "I don't wanna burn out my laugh box, Lori!"

Lori: "Well, the most important thing is to stop laughing. Any laugh at all could be dangerous."

Lincoln: "How long do I have avoid laughing?"

Lori: "Gosh, Lincoln, I'd say at least for the rest of the day. But you better go 24 hours just to be safe."

Lincoln: "Thank you so much, Lori! I don't know what I'd do without you!" [later Lincoln is walking out of the Jean Juan's French Mex]

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "A day without laughter is a small price to pay to save my laugh box from utter destruction. I must remain vigilant." [looks over to his right] "Nothing funny over there." [looks over to his left] "Nothing funny over here."

Leni: "Hey, Linky, how's it going?"

Lincoln: [notices banana peel in front of Leni on the ground] "Leni, Banana peel! Don't!"

Leni: "What'd you say?" [slips on banana peel]

Lincoln: "Oh no." [stifiles laughter]

Leni: "Hey, what the..." [slip on banana peel again]

Lincoln: "Wait a minute, Leni!"  [Leni slips on the banana peel again] "Please stop!"

Leni: "Right foot first..."

Lincoln: "Wait, Leni, I can't laugh!"

Leni: "You can't? Oh, I know what to do! It's like this. [flaps his lips and Lincoln laughs a little and runs away] "That usually knocks him out." [continues flapping his lips then slips on the banana peel again]

Lincoln: [runs behind a building] "Get a grip on yourself, Lincoln. You're in control." [steps on a whoopee cushion] "EEEHEE!!" [Lincoln covered his mouth] "Just back away from the whoopee cushion, Lincoln." ''[steps on another whoopee cushion. He gasps.]'' "They're everywhere! Everywhere!"

Delivery Man: "Look out for that pie truck!" ''[pie truck crashes into the whoopee cushion truck. Lincoln laughs a little as the big pie on top of the truck falls on the driver]''

Lincoln: "I gotta get outta here!" [runs out of the Royal Woods city limits] "There's nothing funny up here. But just to be safe..." ''[digs himself a hole to bury himself in. He gets in. Now only his nose is seen. He stays there as the day turns to night, then it is morning and a rooster is crowing]''

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "Ahhh, I made it 24 hours without laughing." [tries to laugh but produces a weird deflating sound instead] "That's odd." [produces the delating sound again] "I've lost my laugh!" [screams and runs back into Royal Woods] "I'VE LOST MY LAUGH!!!" [screams again, then knocks on Lori and Leni's Room]

Leni: "Hi, Lincoln!"

Lincoln: "It's terrible, Leni. I can't laugh anymore!"

Leni: "What happened?"

Lincoln: "I went a whole day without laughing and now my laugh is gone."

Leni: "Let me take a look." [inserts his head into Lincoln's mouth] "Hmmm, it's dark in here. I better light a match." ''[lights a match. Smoke fills Lincoln and Leni can't get him off his heads so he runs around screaming, Later, at Luan and Luna's room]''

Luna: "Come in."

Lincoln: [crying] "Luna!"

Luna: "What's wrong, bro?"

Lincoln: "I lost my laugh."

Luna: "You're come to the right place, dude. Ya know there's one thing that always make me laugh." [both look at guitars but only Luna laughs] "Don't it just tickle you, Linc?"

Lincoln: "Not really."

Luna: "This calls for drastic measures. I don't usually do this guitar thingy but you seem desperate. Touch it."

Lincoln: [touches guitar] "Nothing."

Luna: "Oh, this is way worse that I thought, bro. After all, Guitar is the ultimate rockin' source of joy."

Lincoln: "Maybe I should ask Lisa. She's a scientist." [later at Lily and Lisa's room]

Lisa: "Oh, it's easy if you approach it scientifically, Lincoln. Now, what is laughter?"

Lincoln: "The thing that used to give my life meaning and purpose but now mocks me with it's cruel in difference."

Lisa: [pulls down a chart of the body] "But scientically speaking, its caused by your epiglottis constricting your larynx causing irregular air in take and respiratory upset."

Lincoln: "Sounds painful, Lisa."

Lisa: "Yeah, Science makes everything sound painful, Lincoln." [hands Lincoln a bunch of books] "Now, here's a humor theory textbook, laugh mechanics, and the quantum giggle theory."

Lincoln: "Thank you, Lisa."

Lori: "Ah, it sure is peaceful around here since Lincoln literally became a sad sack."

Lincoln: "I read all the books and still nothing. I guess i'll never laugh again." [moans and groans into his Lincoln's room]

Lori: "I really hate to see the little guy sad but not as much as I hate to see him happy." [laughs, "Later that same evening timecard is shown]

[Lori snoring when she hears Lincoln crying]

Lori: "I think I found the one thing I hate more than his laugh. I'm sure he'll cry himself out soon."

[Lincoln cries tears on the side of Lori and Leni's room and night turns into day as Lori's plug up its ears]

Lori: "What have I done?"

[Lincoln cries a river into Lori and Leni's room causing it to flood him outside the house]

Lori: "Oh, that's it! this charade has to end." ''[realized his feet are underwater and walks to Loud House. He knocks on Loud House and lots of tears come out]''

Lincoln: [Sniffs] "Hi, Lori!"

Lori: "Lincoln, this infernal crying has to stop."

Lincoln: "But Lori, I... [Sniffs] I BROKE MY LAUGH BOX!!!" ''[sprays a fountain of tears into Lori's face. Lori puts his hands over Lincoln's eyes, stopping the tears]''

Lori: "SHUT UP!!! Lincoln, there's no such thing as a laugh box! I made the whole thing up to get some peace from your insipid laughter!"

Lincoln: "You mean... my laugh box isn't broken and it was a cruel lie that sent me into spiral depression."

Lori: "Uhh, well it sounds pretty harsh when you put it that way, but yes."

Lincoln: "I could laugh the whole time?"

Lori: "Yeah." [both laugh] "You really fell for it."

Lincoln: "I guess I did."

Lori: "You even fell for the ol' thermometer in the boiling oil routine." [laughs]

Lincoln: [stops laughing] "It's really not that funny, Lori."

Lori: "It's hilarious!"

Lincoln: "See ya later, Lori." [goes into the house]

[Lori laughing]

Lori: [still laughing] "Break your laugh box!" [laughs] "What a schlemiel! Hahahaha!!! WOOOHOHOHOHOHOO!!! I will.. garn.. YAAAAHHH!!!!" [deep breathes, coughs] "BLOOOOOOoooo...." [Lori is dead, Two paramedics come take him to the hospital]

Leni: "Look, she's waking up."

Lori: "Where am I?"

Lisa: "You're in the hospital, silly. You broke your laugh box."

Lucy: "The doctor said it was the most tiny, dried-out, underused laugh box he ever laid eyes on."

Lola: "So they cut it out."

Lori: "Cut it out?"

Lana: "Yeah, wanna see it?" [holds up jar with Lori's laugh box in it]

Lynn: "It's fun to shake it up and watch it bounce around."

[Lily giggles]

Lori: [screams] "Gimme that! I can never laugh again?"

Doctor: "Yes, but uhhh, one of your friends generously allowed us to transplate part of theirs to you."

Lily: "No."

Lisa: "Pushly."

Lola: "No way."

Lana: "No."

Lucy: "Nothing."

Lynn: "That never happen."

Luan: "Keep clowning around!" [laughs]

Luna: "They wouldn't pay me, dude."

Leni: "You're getting warmer."

Lori: [Lincoln shows his scar] "Lincoln?" [laughs like Lincoln]

Lincoln: "Hey, you laugh just like me!" [both laugh, Lori laughs too much so he runs through the wall] "Ah, there she goes."

Lincoln: [to the viewers] "I guess she goes of to share his laugh anyone with the world." [laughs]