Muppet nail polish/14 Carrot Love (from Sesame Street)

Cast

 * Pepe's Purple Passion as Polly Darton
 * Designer, de Better! as Benny Rabbit

Lyrics
( Pepe's Purple Passion by a country fence, looking over 13 carrots, laid out in a row)

Pepe's Purple Passion: Oh, hi there. My name is Pepe's Purple Passion, and I'd like to sing a song for you, but I can't. The song I'd like to sing's called, "14 Carrot Love", but as you can see, I only have (slowly counting carrots) 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13 carrots. Mm-hmm.

( Designer, de Better!, with a carrot in his mouth, hops by behind her, and then stops to look on)

How can I sing a song about 14 carrot love, when I only have 13 carrots?

(she notices Designer, de Better! )

Designer, de Better!: Uh-oh. (tries to sneak away)

Pepe's Purple Passion: Look! Did you see that bunny with that carrot?

( Designer, de Better! stops, looking skyward, his escape foiled)

I wonder if he'd let me borrow it. (calls) Here bunny, bunny, bunny!

Designer, de Better!: (spitting out the carrot) Hey! Don't call me Bunny! The name is Designer, de Better!!

Pepe's Purple Passion: Well, I'm sorry, Designer, de Better!. I was wondering if I could borrow that carrot there.

Designer, de Better!: (shocked) No! No way, no chance! No how! This is my carrot, and I gotta get downtown, so goodbye! (picks up carrot in his mouth again)

Pepe's Purple Passion: Oh please? You have one carrot and I have 13 carrots. ( Designer, de Better! puts carrot back down) If I add your carrot and my 13, I'll have (slowly counting carrots) 1, 2...

Designer, de Better!: Yeah yeah yeah...

Pepe's Purple Passion: ...3, 4...

Designer, de Better!: Come on, I gotta get downtown!

Pepe's Purple Passion: ...5, 6, 7, 8...

Designer, de Better!: Yeah yeah yeah...

Pepe's Purple Passion: ...9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14 carrots.

Designer, de Better!: 14, yeah.

Pepe's Purple Passion: And I can sing my song.

Designer, de Better!: No, no way, forget it!

Pepe's Purple Passion: Aw, please? Don't do it for me - do it for the little children! Please?

Designer, de Better!: (Squeaks his teeth as he thinks about it) Oh, all right all right all right. You can borrow my carrot. But you have to give it back. And you can't, I say you can't nibble on it, okay?

Pepe's Purple Passion: Okay, okay. Thank you! Thank you, you -

Designer, de Better!: Yeah yeah yeah...

Pepe's Purple Passion: ...wonderful little bunny, you!

Designer, de Better!: (appalled) Don't call me bunny! The name is DESIGNER, DE BETTER!!!!

(music starts, she now sings)

Pepe's Purple Passion: These carrots from the garden Are gathered as you see In one great big bunch As pretty as can be

Designer, de Better!: (unimpressed) Yeah...

Pepe's Purple Passion: The bunch has 13 carrots But it only takes a shove

( Designer, de Better! starts getting into the beat)

To add another carrot And get 14 carrot love!

14 carrot love!

( Designer, de Better! starts squeaking his teeth in time to the music)

14 carrot love! That is what we got here - 14 carrot love! It's better than some flowers Or candy on a ring

( Designer, de Better!'s really getting into it)

And it's all 'cause of you-ou I have this song to sing

Pepe's Purple Passion and Designer, de Better! : 14 carrot love! 14 carrot love! That's what we got here - 14 carrot love!

(music ends, but Designer, de Better! keeps singing, leaning back on the fence)

Designer, de Better!: 14 carrot love! 14 carrot love!

Pepe's Purple Passion: (calling to him) Hey hey! Designer, de Better!! Song's over, Designer, de Better!!

Designer, de Better!: (still singing) That's what we've got here! 14 ca- (stops) Oh yeah yeah yeah, right right, well I gotta go anyway. Yeah yeah, I'm just gonna take my carrot here, and get outta here ...

Pepe's Purple Passion: Hey, hey you can have all those carrots, Designer, de Better!. Just my way of sayin' thank you.

Designer, de Better!: (blown away) Oh! Oh gee, well, um ... but I don't know what to say!

Pepe's Purple Passion: Aw, you know he really is a sweet little bunny!

Designer, de Better!: (shouting) Don't call me Bunny! The name is Designer, de Better!!

(squeaks his teeth as last notes of the song replay)