Better Late Than Never and Other Stories (with George Carlin, Spike and Friends version)

Better Late Than Never
Narrator: "The animals were finding life difficult. Workmen were mending the viaduct on the main road.

The arches needed strengthening. Hoity Toity did not want to close town while the work was done. And so repairs took a long time.

The animals had to take great care when crossing the viaduct. And the delay often made them late on their journey to the junction where they knew Spike would be waiting to collect his passengers.

Spike grew crosser and crosser."

Spike: "Time's time!"

Narrator: "He grumbled."

Spike: "Why should I have to keep my passengers waiting while Big Macintosh and Cranky dawdle about all day on viaducts?"

Big Macintosh: "Don't blame me!"

Narrator: "Snorted Big Mac."

Big Macintosh: "If we hurry across the viaduct, it might collapse. And then you'd have no passengers at all. What would you do then?"

Spike: "Make my deliveries on time for one thing!"

Narrator: "Retorted Spike. He hurried away before Big Mac could answer.

Angel was impatient too. He was timed to arrive just after Spike. His passengers found that instead of going straight from their rabbit to their dragon, they were kept waiting till Spike arrived.

Soon, Angel grew cross with Spike."

Angel: "Late again!"

Narrator: "He remarked, as Spike panted wearily in."

Angel: "We maybe friends, but I thought you could go fast, Spike. It's time we have another race. I reckon I can beat you now."

Narrator: "Spike kicked dirt loudly."

Spike: "Rubbish!"

Narrator: "He hissed fiercely."

Spike: "It's those main road animals! They dither about on the viaduct, and they blame Hoity Toity's workmen. It's just an excuse for laziness if you ask me!"

Narrator: "One day, Cranky was later than ever at the junction."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I'm sorry, Spike."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "I was held up at the station, and the viaduct made it worse."

Spike: "It's like for you I'm a guarantee connection!"

Narrator: "Grumbled Spike. Before Cranky could answer, he puffed importantly away."

Spike: "Come along, come along."

Narrator: "He panted to the fillies. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle did their best, but Spike soon found that he couldn't save much time.

Suddenly, Spike saw Angel ahead. He didn't look well."

Spike: "What's the matter?"

Narrator: "Asked Spike."

Spike: "You should be at the station by now. You're late!"

Angel: "I feel dreadful."

Narrator: "Moaned Angel."

Angel: "All upset inside, and driver says he can't make me better. Thank goodness you're late too. Can you take my passengers, please? They'll never get home otherwise."

Spike: "Of course."

Narrator: "Agreed Spike. He now felt sorry for Angel, and promised to get help at the next station.

Spike set off again. Already, he felt much more cheerful. And Angel's passengers, traveling with Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle, all reach home safely.

When Angel was better, he came to thank Spike."

Angel: "I'm sorry I teased you about being late."

Narrator: "He said."

Spike: "That's alright."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I'm glad I could help. There are times when being late isn't such a bad thing after all."

Narrator: "With a last cheerful greeting, the two friends went back to work."

Pop Goes the Draconequus
Narrator: "Soarin is proud of being a Wonderbolt Pony. He talks endlessly about it, but he works hard too, and makes everything go like clockwork. It was a splendid day.

The changelings and buffaloes behaved well, the passengers even stopped grumbling, but the animals didn't like having to bustle about."

Soarin: "There are two ways of doing things,"

Narrator: "Soarin told them."

Soarin: "The Wonderbolt way, or the wrong way. I'm a Wonderbolt Pony, and..."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Don't we know it!"

Narrator: "They groaned.

The animals were glad when a visitor came.

He purred smoothly towards them. Hoity Toity introduced him."

Hoity Toity: "Here is Discord. I have agreed to give him a trial. He needs to learn, please teach him, Soarin."

Discord: "Good morning."

Narrator: "Purred Discord in an oily voice."

Discord: "Pleased to meet you, Soarin. Is that Cranky, and Big Mac, and Chief Thunderhooves too? I am delighted to meet such famous animals."

Narrator: "The silly animals were flattered."

Pipsqueak, Cranky Doodle Donkey, Big Macintosh and Chief Thunderhooves: "He has very good manners."

Narrator: "They murmured."

Pipsqueak, Cranky Doodle Donkey, Big Macintosh and Chief Thunderhooves: "We're please to have him in our yard."

Narrator: "Soarin had his doubts."

Soarin: "Come on!"

Narrator: "He said. Discord purred after him."

Discord: "Your worthy To..."

Soarin: "Hoity Toity to you!"

Narrator: "Ordered Soarin.

Discord looked hurt."

Discord: "Your worthy Hoity Toity thinks I need to learn. He is mistaken. We draconequuses don't need to learn. We know everything. We come to a yard and improve it. We are revolutionary."

Soarin: "Oh?"

Narrator: "Said Soarin."

Soarin: "If you're revo-thingummy, perhaps you would collect my changelings while I fetch Chief Thunderhooves' buffaloes."

Narrator: "Discord, delighted to show off, purred away.

When Soarin returned, Discord was trying to take some changelings from a siding. They were old and empty. They have not been touched for a long time. Discord found them hard to move."

Discord: "Pull! Push! Backwards! Forwards!"

Changelings: "Oh! Oh!"

Narrator: "The changelings groaned."

Changelings: "We can't! We wont!"

Narrator: "Soarin watched with interest.

Discord lost patience."

Discord: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "He roared, and gave a great heave. The changelings jerked forward."

Changelings: "Oh! Oh!"

Narrator: "They screamed."

Changelings: "We can't! We wont!"

Narrator: "Some of their joints snapped, and their legs jammed in the lower body."

Discord: "Grrrr!"

Soarin: "Ho ho ho!"

Narrator: "Chuckled Soarin.

Discord recovered and tried to push the changelings back, but they wouldn't move. Soarin ran quietly around to collect the other changelings."

Soarin: "Thank you for arranging these, Discord. I must go now."

Discord: "Don't you want this lot?"

Soarin: "No thank you."

Narrator: "Discord gulped."

Discord: "And I've taken all this trouble? Why didn't you tell me?"

Soarin: "You never asked me. Besides,"

Narrator: "Said Soarin."

Soarin: "You were having such fun being rev-whatever it was you said. Good-bye."

Discord: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "Discord had to help the workmen clear the mess.

He hated it. All the changelings were laughing and singing at him."

Changelings: "Changelings are waiting in the yard, tackling them with ease'll show the world what I can do, gaily boasts the Draconequus, in and out he creeps about, like a big black weasel, when he takes the wrong changelings out, Pop goes the Draconequus!"

Discord: "Grrrr!"

Narrator: "Growled Discord, and scuttled away to sulk in the library."

Discord's Devious Deed
Narrator: "Discord, the new creature, was sulking. The changelings would not stop singing rudely at him.

Soarin was horrified."

Soarin: "Shut up!"

Narrator: "He ordered, and bumped them hard."

Soarin: "I'm sorry our changelings were rude to you, Discord."

Narrator: "Discord was still furious."

Discord: "It's all your fault! You made them laugh at me!"

Big Macintosh: "Nonsense."

Narrator: "Said Big Macintosh."

Big Macintosh: "Soarin would never do that. We animals have our differences, but we'd never talk about them to the changelings. That would be dis... dis..."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Disgraceful!"

Narrator: "Said Chief Thunderhooves."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Disgusting!"

Narrator: "Put in Cranky."

Big Macintosh: "Despicable!"

Narrator: "Finished Big Mac.

Discord hated Soarin. He wanted him to be sent away, so he made a plan; he was going to tell lies about Soarin.

Next day, he spoke to the changelings."

Discord: "I see you like jokes. You made a good joke about me yesterday, I laughed and laughed. Soarin told me one about Chief Thunderhooves. I'll whisper it.

Don't tell Chief Thunderhooves I told you."

Narrator: "And he snickered away."

Changelings: "Ha ha ha!"

Narrator: "Guffawed the Changelings."

Changelings: "Chief Thunderhooves will be cross with Soarin when he knows.

Let's tell him and get back at Soarin for bumping us!"

Narrator: "They laughed rudely at the animals as they went by.

Soon, Chief Thunderhooves, Big Macintosh and Cranky found out why."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Disgraceful!"

Narrator: "Said Chief Thunderhooves."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Disgusting!"

Narrator: "Said Cranky."

Big Macintosh: "Despicable!"

Narrator: "Said Big Mac."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "We cannot allow it!"

Narrator: "They consulted together."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Yes,"

Narrator: "They said."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "He did it to us, we'll do it to him, and see how he likes it!"

Narrator: "Soarin was tired out.

The changelings had been cheeky and troublesome.

He wanted a rest in his home.

The three animals barred his way."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Keep out!"

Soarin: "Stop fooling!"

Narrator: "Said Soarin."

Soarin: "I'm tired!"

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "So are we."

Narrator: "Hissed the animals."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "We're tired of you. We like Discord. We don't like you. You tell tales about us to the changelings."

Soarin: "I don't!"

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "You do!"

Soarin: "I don't!

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Cranky Doodle Donkey: "You do!"

Narrator: "Hoity Toity came to stop the noise."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Soarin called me a galloping sausage!"

Narrator: "Spluttered Chief Thunderhooves."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Rusty brown scrap iron!"

Narrator: "Put in Cranky."

Big Macintosh: "I'm old square hooves."

Narrator: "Fumed Big Mac."

Hoity Toity: "Well, Soarin?"

Narrator: "Soarin considered."

Soarin: "I only wish, sir,"

Narrator: "He said gravely,"

Soarin: "That I'd thought of those names myself. If the wing fits..."

Hoity Toity: "Ahem..."

Big Macintosh, Chief Thunderhooves and Crank Doodle Donkey: "He made changelings laugh at us!"

Narrator: "Accused the animals.

Hoity Toity recovered. He'd been trying not to laugh himself."

Hoity Toity: "Did you, Soarin?"

Soarin: "Certainly not, sir. No pony would be as mean as that!"

Narrator: "Discord lurked up."

Hoity Toity: "Now, Discord, you heard what Soarin said."

Discord: "I can't understand it, sir. To think that Soarin, of all animals... I'm dreadfully grieved, sir, but know nothing."

Hoity Toity: "I see."

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity.

Discord squirmed, and hoped he didn't."

Hoity Toity: "I'm sorry, Soarin, but you must go to Shining Armor's station for a while. I know he will be glad to see you."

Soarin: "As you wish, sir."

Narrator: "Soarin trundled sadly away, while Discord smirked with triumph."

A Close Shave for Soarin
Narrator: "Soarin the Wonderbolt Pony puffed sadly to Shining Armor's Station."

Soarin: "It's not fair!"

Narrator: "He complained."

Soarin: "Discord has been telling lies about me, and made Hoity Toity and all the animals think I'm horrid."

Narrator: "Shining Armor smiled."

Shining Armor: "I know you aren't, and so does Hoity Toity. You wait and see. Why don't you help me with these changelings?"

Narrator: "Soarin felt happier with Shining Armor, and set to work at once.

The changelings were silly, heavy, and noisy. The two ponies had to work hard, pushing and pulling them all afternoon. At last, they reached the top of the hill."

Soarin: "Good-bye!"

Narrator: "Whistled Soarin, and rolled gently over the crossing to the other line.

Soarin loved coasting down the hill, running easily with the wind whistling past. Suddenly, it was a conductor's warning whistle!"

Changelings: "Hurrah, hurrah, hurrah!"

Narrator: "Laughed the changelings."

Changelings: "We've broken away! We've broken away! Chase him! Bump him! Throw him off the road!"

Narrator: "They yelled."

Soarin's Driver: "Hurry, Soarin, Hurry!"

Narrator: "Said the driver. They raced through Shining Armor's station, but the changelings were catching up."

Soarin's Driver: "As fast as we can, then they'll catch us gradually!"

Narrator: "The driver was gaining control."

Soarin's Driver: "Another clear mile, and we'll do it!"

Soarin: "Oh, glory, look at that!"

Narrator: "Cranky was just pulling out on their line from the station ahead. Any minute, there could be a crash!

Soarin's Driver: "It's up to you now, Soarin!"

Narrator: "Cried the driver.

Soarin put every ounce of weight and strength against the changelings."

Soarin: "It's too late!"

Narrator: "Soarin groaned. He veered into a siding where a barber set up shop. He was shaving a customer."

(CRASH!)

"The silly changelings had knocked their conductor down, and left him far behind after he had whistled a warning.

But the changelings didn't care. They were feeling very pleased with themselves."

Soarin: "Beg pardon, sir."

Narrator: "Gasped Soarin."

Soarin: "Excuse my intrusion."

The Barber: "No, I won't!"

Narrator: "Said The Barber."

The Barber: "You've frightened my customers! I'll teach you!"

Narrator: "And he lathered Soarin's face all over. Poor Soarin.

Spike was helping to pull the changelings away, when Hoity Toity arrived."

The Barber: "I do not like ponies popping through my walls!"

Narrator: "Fumed The Barber."

Hoity Toity: "I appreciate your feelings,"

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "But you must know that this pony and his crew have prevented a very serious accident. It was a very close shave."

The Barber: "Oh."

Narrator: "Said The Barber."

The Barber: "Oh. Excuse me."

Narrator: "He filled a basin of water to wash Soarin's face."

The Barber: "I'm sorry. I didn't know you were being a brave pony."

Soarin: "That's all right, sir. I didn't know that, either."

Hoity Toity: "You were very brave, indeed."

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "I'm proud of you."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity watched the rescue operation, then he had more news for Soarin."

Hoity Toity: "And when you are properly washed and healed, you are coming home."

Soarin: "Home, sir? Do you mean the yard?"

Hoity Toity: "Of course."

Soarin: "But sir, they don't like me. They like Discord."

Hoity Toity: "Not now. I never believed Discord, so I sent him packing. The animals are sorry and want you back."

Narrator: "A few days later, when he came home, here was a really rousing welcome for Soarin the Wonderbolt Pony."

Chief Thunderhooves Takes a Dip
Narrator: "Chief Thunderhooves was resting in a siding. Sometimes he thought,"

Chief Thunderhooves: "It's very tiring to be such a large and splendid buffalo. One does have to keep up appearances so."

Big Macintosh: "Peep, peep, peep, peep! Hello, lazybones!"

Narrator: "Whistled Big Macintosh."

Chief Thunderhooves: "What cheek!"

Narrator: "Spluttered Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "That Big Mac is too big for his hooves. Fancy speaking to me like that. Me, who has never had an accident."

Pipsqueak: "Aren't jammed whistles and pulled muscles accidents?"

Narrator: "Asked Pipsqueak innocently."

Chief Thunderhooves: "No, indeed. High spirits, might happen to any animal. But to come off the path like Big Mac did, well I ask you. Is that right? Is it decent?"

Narrator: "Then it was Big Mac's turned to take the express. Chief Thunderhooves watched him getting ready."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Be careful, Big Mac. You're not pulling the Flying Kipper now. Mind you keep on the path today."

Narrator: "Big Mac went off in a huff, and Chief Thunderhooves yawned and went to sleep. But not for long."

Chief Thunderhooves' Driver: "Wake up, Chief Thunderhooves."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

Chief Thunderhooves' Driver: "A special load's coming and we're to take it."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Is it buffaloes or changelings?"

Chief Thunderhooves' Driver: "Changelings."

Narrator: "Said his driver."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Changelings?"

Narrator: "Said Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Puh-huh!"

Narrator: "Chief Thunderhooves' body was slow to start. So Shining Armor helped Chief Thunderhooves to the turntable to get him facing the right way."

Chief Thunderhoove: "I won't go, I won't go!"

Narrator: "Grumbled Chief Thunderhooves."

Shining Armor: "Don't be silly, don't be silly."

Narrator: "Puffed Shining Armor.

At last, Chief Thunderhooves was on the turntable. The movement had shaken his body. It was now moving nicely.

Chief Thunderhooves was cross and didn't care what he did. He waited till the table was half way around."

Chief Thunderhooves: "I'll show them, I'll show them!"

Narrator: "He hissed.

He moved slowly forward to jam the table, but he couldn't stop himself and slid into a ditch."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Oosh!"

Narrator: "He hissed."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Get me out, get me out!"

Chief Thunderhooves' Driver and Fireman: "Not a hope."

Narrator: "Said his driver and fireman."

Chief Thunderhooves' Driver and Fireman: "You're stuck you silly great buffalo. Don't you understand that?"

Narrator: "They telephoned Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "So Chief Thunderhooves didn't want to take the load and ran into a ditch?

What's that you say? The special's waiting? Tell Shining Armor to take it, please. And Chief Thunderhooves? Oh, leave him where he is. We'll get him out later."

Narrator: "On the other side of the ditch, some little boys were chattering."

Boys: "Oh, doesn't he look silly? They'll never get him out."

Narrator: "They began to sing."

Boys: "Silly Thunderhooves fell in a ditch, fell in a ditch, fell in a ditch! Silly Thunderhooves fell in a ditch, all on a Monday morning!"

Narrator: "Chief Thunderhooves laid in the ditch all day."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Oh dear!"

Narrator: "He thought."

Chief Thunderhooves: "I shall never get out."

Narrator: "But that evening, they lifted Chief Thunderhooves, and made a roll of sleepers under his hooves to keep him from the mud. Strong ropes were fastened to his back end, and Cranky and Big Mac, pulling hard, managed to bring him to safety.

Late that night, Chief Thunderhooves crawled home, a sadder and wiser buffalo."

Down The Mine
Narrator: "One day, Spike was at the junction, when Chief Thunderhooves shuffled in with some changelings."

Spike: "Phew!"

Narrator: "Remarked Spike."

Spike: "What a funny smell.

Can you smell a smell?"

Apple Bloom: "I can't smell a smell."

Narrator: "Said Apple Bloom."

Spike: "A funny, musty sort of smell."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Chief Thunderhooves: "No one noticed it till' you did."

Narrator: "Grunted Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "It must be yours."

Narrator: "Not long ago, he had fallen in a dirty ditch. Spike enjoyed teasing him about it."

Spike: "Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, do you know what I think it is? It's ditchwater."

Narrator: "Before Chief Thunderhooves could answer, Spike puffed away.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle could hardly believe their ears."

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle: "He's dreadfully rude, I feel quite ashamed. I feel quite ashamed, he's dreadfully rude."

Narrator: "And to Spike, they said,"

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle: "You mustn't be rude, you make us ashamed."

Narrator: "But Spike didn't care a bit."

Spike: "That was funny. That was funny."

Narrator: "He chuckled. He felt very pleased with himself.

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were deeply shocked. They had great respect for Chief Thunderhooves the Buffaloe.

Spike left the fillies at the station, and went off to a mine for some changelings.

Long ago, miners digging for lead had made tunnels under the ground. Their rooves are strong enough to hold up changelings, but not the weight of animals. A large notice warns them not to enter the area.

Danger! Animals must not pass this board."

Spike: "Silly old board."

Narrator: "Thought Spike.

He had often tried to pass it, but had never succeeded, but this morning, he made a plan.

The fireman went to through the switch."

Spike: "Now for my plan."

Narrator: "Thought Spike.

Bumping the changelings fiercely, he jerked his driver off the footplate and followed them into the siding."

Spike's Driver: "Come back!"

Narrator: "Yelled his driver."

Spike: "Fire and smoke!"

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I'm sunk!"

Narrator: "And he was."

Spike: "Oh, dear."

Narrator: "He said."

Spike: "I am a silly dragon."

Hoity Toity: "And a very naughty one, too. I saw you!"

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity."

Spike: "Please get me out, I won't do it again!"

Hoity Toity: "I'm not sure. We can't lift you out with a crane. The ground's not firm enough.

Hmmm. Let me see. I wonder if Chief Thunderhooves could pull you out."

Spike: "Yes, sir."

Narrator: "Said Spike, but he didn't want to meet Chief Thunderhooves just yet."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Down a mine, is he? Ha, ha, ha!"

Narrator: "Laughed Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "What a joke!

All right, little Spike, we'll have you out in a couple of puffs!"

Narrator: "Strong cables were fastened between the two animals."

Hoity Toity: "Are you ready?

Heave!"

Narrator: "It was a lot harder than they all thought. At last, Spike was free.

Spike: "I'm sorry I was cheeky."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Chief Thunderhooves: "That's alright, Spike. You made me laugh."

Narrator: "Replied Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "I'm in disgrace."

Spike: "So am I."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Why so you are, Spike. Shall we form an alliance? You help me, and I'll help you."

Spike: "Right you are!"

Narrator: "Agreed Spike."

Chief Thunderhooves: "Good, that's settled."

Narrator: "Rumbled Chief Thunderhooves.

And hoof to hoof, the allies puffed home."

The Runaway
Narrator: "Spike the Dragon was ill. Workmen had tried to make him better, but it was no use."

Hoity Toity: "Shining Armor must take you to the works."

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity.

Spike felt very miserable.

Then, Hoity Toity spoke to Soarin."

Hoity Toity: "I want you to help Pipsqueak and Braeburn while Spike is away."

Narrator: "Soarin was delighted.

He already knew Pipsqueak, and soon made friends with Braeburn and Angel. Featherweight the Pegasus gave him a big welcome too."

Featherweight: "Take care of Spike's fillies."

Narrator: "He advised."

Featherweight: "He's sure to miss them while he's away."

Narrator: "Soarin was very gently with the fillies. Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were very impressed."

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle: "Such nice manners."

Narrator: "They told each other."

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle: "It really is a pleasure to go out with him."

Narrator: "When Spike came back, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle told him how well Soarin had managed. Spike was so please to be home that he soon forgot to be jealous.

The works had left Spike's feet very stiff. It made his feet seem as if they weren't moving, when in fact they were.

As a result, he and his fillies often over ran the platform. Spike found this most embarrassing.

Gradually, his driver and fireman learned to be extra careful. But one day, Spike's fireman was ill and a relief man took his place.

The fireman had tied the ropes, and joined the driver and stationmaster on the platform to wait for Big Macintosh's passengers. The fireman had forgotten all about Spike's feet. Spike simmered happily."

Spike: "Not long now."

Narrator: "He thought, as he saw Big Mac slowly approaching.

But then, Spike felt his feet begin to move. He tried to stop, but he couldn't without his driver and fireman. He tried to whistle a warning, but he couldn't do that either. The conductor, driver, fireman and passengers were all stranded on the platform."

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle: "Stop, stop!"

Narrator: "Shrieked Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. But Spike, with plenty of energy, kept on going. The alarm went off down the road."

Signalman: "Stop the runaway!"

Narrator: "There, ready for action, was Owlowiscious the Owl. The inspector had made a plan, and together they took off into the sky.

At last, Spike was tiring."

Spike: "I need to stop, I need to stop."

Narrator: "He panted wearily.

As they neared the next station, Spike saw Owlowiscious land.

They entered the platform slowly enough for the inspector to act. Judging his moment, the inspector jumped on Spike and stopped him.

At last, Spike stopped. Both he and the inspector were very relief. Then they thanked Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "Thank nothing of it. Glad to be of service anytime."

Inspector: "Spike,"

Narrator: "Remarked the inspector."

Inspector: "We must never let this happen again."

Narrator: "Wearily, Spike agreed with him."

A Scarf for Pipsqueak
Narrator: "It was a cold winter's morning in Ponyville. The wind was bitter and the ground hard with frost. Spike and Pipsqueak were cold and cross."

Spike: "All I want is a warm body."

Narrator: "Huffed Spike."

Spike: "Firelight knows that. He's late."

Pipsqueak: "He's not late."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "This weather woke us up early."

Narrator: "Gusts of wind swirled round the library, tossing flakes of snow towards Spike. Then they swooshed around Pipsqueak too."

Pipsqueak: "Why don't we talk about something else?"

Narrator: "Shivered Pipsqueak."

Spike: "Yes."

Narrator: "Replied Spike."

Spike: "Like how silly we'll look when you heads turn into icicles."

Pipsqueak: "That's not funny. Maybe we'll stop feeling cold if we talk about warm things, like sunshine and steam."

Spike: "And firelighters."

Narrator: "Muttered Spike."

Pipsqueak: "Scarves!"

Narrator: "Continued Pipsqueak."

Spike: "Scarves."

Narrator: "Laughed Spike."

Spike: "That's what you need, Pipsqueak. A woolly scarf round your neck."

Narrator: "Spike was only teasing. But Pipsqueak thought happily about scarves until the firelighter came.

Hoity Toity was enjoying hot porridge for breakfast. He was looking forward to taking important visitors on a tour of the town, and had pressed his special trousers."

Hoity Toity: "I shall put them in my trunk."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity said to Princess Celestia."

Hoity Toity: "And change into them just before the photographs are taken."

Narrator: "Then he set off to catch his ride.

Pipsqueak was now working hard. His body was warm, and he had plenty of strength, but he still thought about scarves. He saw them everywhere he went."

Pipsqueak: "My funnel's cold, my funnel's cold."

Narrator: "He puffed."

Pipsqueak: "I want a scarf, I want a scarf."

Big Macintosh: "Rubbish, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Said Big Macintosh."

Big Macintosh: "Ponies don't wear scarves."

Pipsqueak: "Ponies with proper necks do."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Your neck is too big."

Narrator: "Before Big Mac could answer, Pipsqueak puffed away. Big Mac snorted. He was looking forward to pulling the special cart.

It was time for the photographs. Everyone was excited. Hoity Toity was waiting on the platform for his trousers. They were in a trunk amongst a big load of baggage. The porters were taking the baggage trolley across the line. They were walking backwards to see that nothing fell off.

Pipsqueak was still being cheeky. His driver always shut off steam just outside the station. Pipsqueak wanted to surprise the buffaloes by coming in as quietly as he could.

But the porters didn't here him either. Pipsqueak gave them such a fright that boxes and bags burst everywhere."

Pipsqueak: "Oh!"

Narrator: "Groaned Pipsqueak.

Sticky streams of jam trickled down Pipsqueak's face. A hat fell on his hoof. Worst of all, a pair of trousers coiled lovingly round his neck.

Everyone was a very angry. Hoity Toity seized the top hat."

Hoity Toity: "Mine!"

Narrator: "He said."

Hoity Toity: "Pipsqueak, look at this!"

Pipsqueak: "Yes sir. I am sir."

Hoity Toity: "My best trousers too!"

Pipsqueak: "Yes sir. Please sir."

Hoity Toity: "We must pay the passengers for their spoiled clothes, and my trousers are ruined. I hope this will teach you not to play tricks with the buffaloes."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak went off to the yard. He felt very silly. On the way, he met Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Hello, Pipsqueak. So you found a scarf, eh? But legs go in trousers, not necks."

Narrator: "And he puffed off to tell Big Mac the news.

That evening, Spike and Pipsqueak were resting in the shed. Pipsqueak's driver had taken away the trousers and given Pipsqueak a good rubdown."

Spike: "Firelighter's promised to come early tomorrow."

Narrator "Said Spike. Big Macintosh arrived. He'd enjoyed taking the visitors around and now felt sorry for Pipsqueak too."

Big Macintosh: "Driver says the weather will be warmer tomorrow. You won't need a scarf, Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Certainly not."

Narrator: "Replied Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "Ponies don't need scarves. Ponies need warm bodies. Everyone knows that."

Big Macintosh's Forest
Narrator: "Big Macintosh the Red Horse has lived in Ponyville for many years. He wouldn't want to be anywhere else. He likes every part of it. From the fields filled with flowers to the white sandy beaches. But there is one place that Big Mac always enjoyed visiting more than any other. His driver knew this too."

Big Macintosh's Driver: "Come on, Big Mac."

Narrator: "He would sometimes say."

Big Macintosh's Driver: "We've made good time today. We'll stop for a while by the forest."

Narrator: "Big Macintosh loved it here. The forest was full of broad oaks and tall pines.

Big Mac could remember the day long ago where he and Braeburn brought some new trees to be planted and Featherweight and Gummy helped haul them into place. Now he could see the trees growing amongst the others on the hillside. Big Mac always felt better for being here. He couldn't really explain why, but his driver understood."

Big Macintosh's Driver: "It's peaceful."

Narrator: "He said to Big Mac.

But one night, everything changed. The animals were resting in the library."

Spike: "Listen."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "Can you hear a strange whistling sound?"

Braeburn: "It's the wind blowing outside our library."

Narrator: "Replied Braeburn."

Braeburn: "But I've never heard it like this before."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Do you know?"

Narrator: "Added Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "If Chief Thunderhooves wasn't here now, I'd say it was him thundering by with the buffaloes."

Narrator: "All the animals laughed, except Big Mac."

Big Macintosh: "I hope the wind won't harm the forest."

Narrator: "By morning, the fierce winds had gone, but the damage was done. Big Mac's driver came to see him in the library."

Big Macintosh's Driver: "Trees have fallen on the path."

Narrator: "He said."

Big Macintosh's Driver: "We must help clear the path."

Narrator: "Night Light set off with the breakdown crane, and Big Mac followed.

Trees lay everywhere. The hillside now looked so bare. Big Mac felt sad."

Big Macintosh: "What will happen to all the animals who live here?"

Narrator: "He thought.

When Big Mac's carts were full of logs, he took them to the timber mill where they would be turned into furniture and other things. Big Mac was glad the wood was being put to good use, but he was still sorry to lose part of his forest."

Braeburn: "Oh dear."

Narrator: "Sighed Braeburn to Spike."

Braeburn: "I wish there was something we can do to make things better again."

Spike: "Yes, indeed."

Narrator: "Replied Spike."

Spike: "But what? We can't mend broken trees."

Hoity Toity: "Hello Braeburn."

Narrator: "Said Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "You do look glum."

Braeburn: "I'm sad about the trees."

Narrator: "Said Braeburn."

Braeburn: "And so is Big Macintosh. The forest is a special place to him. Now some of it is gone."

Hoity Toity: "We'll soon put that right."

Narrator: "Replied Hoity Toity."

Hoity Toity: "I have an important job for you, Braeburn. I would like you to take some carts to the forest."

Narrator: "When the carts arrived, Braeburn was delighted. They were full of splendid young trees all ready for planting."

Braeburn: "This is the best job I've ever had."

Narrator: "Said Braeburn happily.

When Big Mac returned, he was most surprised. There were Featherweight and Gummy busily helping the workmen clear the torn stumps and branches."

Featherweight: "Look Big Mac."

Narrator: "Called Featherweight."

Featherweight: "We're beginning again. The hillside will look better than ever before. You'll see."

Narrator: "Now whenever Big Mac stops by the forest, he could see the new trees growing strong and tall. Sometimes, everywhere is very quiet. And at other times, Big Mac could hear leaves rustling, or a bird's wing brushing the air. Often he can hear the distance sound of children laughing. And always, he is happy here."

The Deputation
Narrator: "Snow came early to Ponyville. It was heavier than usual. Most animals hate snow. Night Light and Hondo Flanks were used to it. Back to back, with a cart behind them and a shovel for each of them, they set to work. They puffed backwards and forwards, patrolling the roads.

Generally, the snow slipped away easily, but sometimes they found deeper drifts.

Presently, they came to a drift which was larger than most. They charged it, and were just backing for another try, when..."

Big Macintosh: "Help! Help!"

Hondo Flanks: "Lorsh sakes, Night Light! It's Big Mac!

Don't worry yourself, Big Mac! Wait a while, we'll have you out!"

Narrator: "Big Macintosh was very grateful. He saw all was not well. The unicorns were looking glum. They told him Hoity Toity was making a decision."

Night Light and Hondo Flanks: "He'll send us away for sure!"

Pipsqueak: "It's a shame!"

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Chief Thunderhooves: "A lot of nonsense about a broken signal box."

Narrator: "Grumbled Chief Thunderhooves."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "That Dr. Caballeron, too."

Narrator: "Put in Cranky."

Cranky Doodle Donkey: "Good riddance, That's what I say."

Big Macintosh: "The unicorns were splendid in the snow."

Narrator: "Added Big Macintosh."

Big Macintosh: "It isn't fair!"

Narrator: "They all agreed that something must be done, but none knew what.

Pipsqueak decided to talk to Shining Armor about it."

Shining Armor: "What you need,"

Narrator: "Said Shining Armor,"

Shining Armor: "Is a deputation."

Narrator: "He explained what that was.

Pipsqueak ran back quickly."

Pipsqueak: "Shining Armor says we need... a, a depot station!"

Chief Thunderhooves: "Of course."

Narrator: "Said Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "The question is.."

Big Macintosh: "What is a... desperation?"

Narrator: "Asked Big Mac."

Pipsqueak: "It's when animals tell Hoity Toity something's wrong."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak."

Soarin: "Did you say 'Tell Hoity Toity?'"

Narrator: "Asked Soarin thoughtfully.

There was a long silence."

Chief Thunderhooves: "I propose,"

Narrator: "Said Chief Thunderhooves."

Chief Thunderhooves: "That Pipsqueak be our... um... disputation."

Pipsqueak: "Me?"

Narrator: "Squeaked Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "I can't!"

Big Macintosh: "Rubbish, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Said Big Mac."

Big Macintosh: "It's easy.

Chief Thunderhooves: "That's settled, then."

Narrator: "Grumbled Chief Thunderhooves.

Poor Pipsqueak wished it wasn't."

Hoity Toity: "Hello, Pipsqeauk. It's nice to be back."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak jumped."

Pipsqueak: "Uh, uh, yes Sir, yes Sir, please Sir."

Hoity Toity: "You look nervous, Pipsqueak. What's the matter."

Pipsqueak: "Please Sir, uh, they've, they've made me a desperation, Sir. Uh, to speak to you, Sir. I don't like it, Sir."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity pondered."

Hoity Toity: "Do you mean a deputation, Pipsqueak?"

Pipsqueak: "Yes, Sir, please, Sir. Uh, it's Night Light and Hondo Flanks. They say, Sir, that if you send them away, Sir, well, they'll be killed, Sir. That would be dreadful, Sir. Uh, please, Sir, don't send them away."

Hoity Toity: "Thank you, Pipsqueak. That will do."

Narrator: "Later, Hoity Toity spoke to the animals."

Hoity Toity: "I've had a... a deputation. I understand your feelings and I've given a lot of thought to the matter."

Narrator: "He paused impressively."

Hoity Toity: "Night Light and Hondo Flanks, I hear that your work in the snow was good. You shall each have some new clothes."

Narrator: "The unicorns were surprised."

Night Light and Hondo Flanks: "Thank you, Sir."

Hoity Toity: "But your clothes will have your names printed on them. We'll have no more mistakes."

Night Light and Hondo Flanks: "Thank you, Sir. Uh, does, does this mean that the both of us..."

Narrator: "Hoity Toity smiled."

Hoity Toity: "It means..."

Narrator: "But the rest of his speech was drowned in a delighted chorus of cheers and whistles."

(All the animals cheer and whistle)

Narrator: "The unicorns were here to stay."

Spike and Pipsqueak's Mountain Adventure
Narrator: "If someday you should see Spike the Dragon puffing happily along the route, he may be on his way to a village nestled deep in the heart of Equestria.

One November morning, Spike called to all his friends."

Spike: "It's nearly Thanksgiving, and I'll bring you lots of letters and parcels."

Narrator: "But then, an early snowstorm came.

Ponyville was covered in thick snow. The animals found work difficult. Some had to help clear snow from the roads, and workmen hacked away at the frozen banks of ice.

Spike and Pipsqueak were collecting important mail for Thanksgiving."

Spike: "Driver says there's lots of mail for the village."

Narrator: "Said Spike."

Spike: "I'll need an extra changeling for it all."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was feeling left out."

Pipsqueak: "It's not fair. You're not leaving any mail for me."

Narrator: "But Pipsqueak's chance had come."

Spike's Driver: "There's been a change of plans."

Narrator: "Said Spike's driver."

Spike's Driver: "Hoity Toity needs us at the big station. Pipsqueak, you are to take Spike's load to the village."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was delighted, but Spike was sad."

Spike: "I won't be able to say Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends."

Pipsqueak: "Don't worry."

Narrator: "Said Pipsqueak kindly."

Pipsqueak: "I'll do it for you."

Spike: "It's not the same."

Narrator: "Sighed Spike.

Pipsqueak was making good time on his way to the village when suddenly,"

Pipsqueak's Driver: "What's that?"

Narrator: "Called his driver. There ahead was a fogman by the path. He was holding a red light."

Fogman: "The village is cut off by snow."

Narrator: "He shouted."

Fogman: "We need shovels, workmen and an owl. Leave your changelings in the siding, and go back quickly."

Narrator: "Pipsqueak was soon hurrying to Owlowiscious' tree."

Pipsqueak: "Wake up, lazywings! The mountain villagers need your help. They're stranded."

Owlowiscious: "Whizzo!"

Narrator: "Replied Owlowiscious."

Owlowiscious: "I like an emergency to keep me warm."

Narrator: "And he flew away."

Pipsqueak: "Now."

Narrator: "Sighed Pipsqueak."

Pipsqueak: "What's next?"

Narrator: "Suddenly, there was Spike with Featherweight the Pegasus and the works trailer."

Spike: "Come on, Pipsqueak."

Narrator: "Whistled Spike."

Spike: "Follow me."

Narrator: "The two animals battled their way through the snow.

At last, they reached the village. Owlowiscious was already there busily dropping Thanksgiving dinner to people below.

Featherweight quickly got to work."

Featherweight: "Lovely stuff!"

Narrator: "He said, as he pushed the snow aside."

Villagers: "Well done, Pipsqueak! Well done, Spike!"

Narrator: "Cheered the villagers."

Spike: "Pipsqueak, I just remembered, your mail is still back at the siding, isn't it?"

Narrator: "Pipsqueak hurried back to fetch it.

Just then, Braeburn arrived with Scootaloo."

Braeburn: "We've brought lots of hot drinks and food for the villagers."

Narrator: "He whistled.

That night, all the animals went back to the library, except Braeburn. The villagers had made a plan to thank the animals. They gave Scootaloo paint pots and parcels, then they set off through the moonlit countryside.

All the animals were fast asleep in the library as Braeburn ran silently into the yard. He had no idea what the villagers were going to do, but he knew it was going to be a big surprise.

When the animals woke the next morning, they could not believe their eyes. The library had been repainted and decorated. The animals cheered in delight, and everyone agreed that it was a really happy Thanksgiving."