Muppets/Nasty Dan (from Sesame Street)

Cast

 * Big Tiny Tallsaddle as Johnny Cash
 * Sam the Eagle as Oscar the Grouch

Lyrics
spoken:

Sam the Eagle: Who goes there?

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: You'll like this.

sung:

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: Old Nasty Dan was the meanest man I ever knew He'd stomp and scream and be real mean the whole day through

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah? )

He'd frown a bunch He ate nails for lunch And he'd never laugh

( Sam the Eagle: Wow! I'd like him! )

He'd growl and yell and I heard tell he never took a bath

( Sam the Eagle: Wow. )

Nasty Dan

( Sam the Eagle: Nasty Dan? )

Was a nasty man!

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah? )

Hard to understand that Nasty Dan

( Sam the Eagle: Hmm. )

Now Nasty Dan was a nasty man the whole day long

( Sam the Eagle: Good for him! )

He'd go where he could and he'd try real good to make things go wrong

( Sam the Eagle: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. )

He'd jump for joy when a little boy would trip and fall

( Sam the Eagle: Really mean. )

And the only words that he ever said were "I don't like you at all."

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah, right on! )

Nasty Dan

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah. )

Was a nasty man

( Sam the Eagle: Heh, heh, heh. )

Hard to understand that Nasty Dan

spoken:

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: Now here's the best part, it's about a girl named Nasty Pearl.

Sam the Eagle: Oh, she sounds okay too!

sung:

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: Nasty Pearl was a nasty girl who met Dan somehow She said, "You're like me, rotten as can be, let's get married now." So they went and they did and had a nasty kid and I must confess That Dan pretty much leaves everybody alone now And he doesn't bother anybody anymore 'Cause he just lives in his nasty old house With his nasty old wife

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah? )

And his nasty kid

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah? )

In nasty happiness!

( Sam the Eagle: Far out! )

Nasty Dan He's a happy man!

( Sam the Eagle: Yeah. )

Hard to understand that Nasty Dan

spoken:

Sam the Eagle: Wow, that was really great.

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: You like that?

Sam the Eagle: And say, aren't you Big Shiny Tallsaddle?

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: Tiny Tallsaddle.

Sam the Eagle: Tiny, Tiny.

Big Tiny Tallsaddle: Have a rotten day.

Sam the Eagle: Wow, there goes my kind of guy.