Cheese Sandwich and the Buffaloes (BiggestThomasFan's version)

Cheese Sandwich and the Buffaloes is BiggestThomasFan's My Little Pony/Thomas parody of his fan-made episode, Salty and the Coaches.

Characters

 * Shining Armor as Edward
 * Cherry Fizzy as Porter
 * Fancy Pants BoCo
 * Cheese Sandwich as Salty
 * Gustave Le Grand as Cranky
 * Hoity Toity as Sir Topham Hatt
 * Big Daddy McColt as The Grumpy Passenger
 * Bulk Biceps Rocky (does not speak)
 * Cranky Doodle Donkey as James (cameo)
 * Thunderlane as Stanley (cameo)
 * Shady Daze as Timothy (cameo)
 * Scorpan as Bear (cameo)
 * Stellar Eclipse as Reg (cameo)

Transcript
Narrator: Cheese Sandwich the Earth Pony has worked at Ponyville Docks for many years. He loves to work there, and he's very good at keeping the changelings in order. But Cheese Sandwich hadn't had much experience with buffaloes.

One day, the wind blew across the town. There was an old tree standing by the path on Shining Armor's route. The wind blew so hard that the tree fell over and onto the path, just as Shining Armor was approaching it.

Shining Armor: Bust my horn!

(Shining Armor tries to stop, but can't stop in time and ends up crashing into the tree)

Narrator: No one was hurt, but Shining Armor's front was badly damaged. Bulk Biceps soon arrived to help clear the mess. Hoity Toity arrived as well.

Hoity Toity: Shining Armor, you will have to go to the works to get your front mended.

Shining Armor: Yes, sir, but what about the loads on my route? Fancy Pants can't handle them all by himself.

Hoity Toity: I'll have to see which animals are able to help out.

Narrator: Hoity Toity checked the timetable to see who would be able to help out until Shining Armor was repaired.

Hoity Toity: Hmm...

Narrator: Then, he went straight to Ponyville Docks.

Hoity Toity: Hello, Cheese Sandwich and Cherry Fizzy. I need one of you to help out on this branch line for a few days while Shining Armor is being repaired.

Cherry Fizzy: What happened to Shining Armor?

Hoity Toity: He hit a tree that fell on his path, and it damaged his front. So now I need an animal to help pull buffaloes on his route until he's repaired.

Cheese Sandwich: I'll do it, captain! I'm sure the passengers will be happy that I'm taking them.

Hoity Toity: Very well, Cheese Sandwich. A passenger ride is due to leave here in about 15 minutes, so you better get some buffaloes ready now.

Cheese Sandwich: Yes, captain. I better get filled up with elixir first. I'll get some buffaloes once I'm fulled up.

Hoity Toity: Alright, Cheese Sandwich.

(Hoity Toity leaves while Cheese Sandwich starts to fill his body with elixir)

Cheese Sandwich: Cherry Fizzy, do you know anything about pulling passengers? I've not had much experience with them.

Cherry Fizzy: I'm afraid not, Cheese Sandwich. I've always done either goods work or shunting. I've never pulled buffaloes before. But didn't you once carry the passengers the time you tried to avoid going to the mainland on a ship?

Cheese Sandwich: Yes, but that was only one buffalo. I think I'll be pulling more than that. Never mind, matey. I'll figure it out.

Narrator: Once Cheese Sandwich's body was full, he collected some buffaloes from a siding and hurried over to the passengers loading dock where some passengers were waiting.

Cheese Sandwich: Ahoy, everyone! I'm Cheese Sandwich, and I'll be your pony for this run.

Narrator: Once all the passengers were on board, the guard blew his whistle and Cheese Sandwich pulled away. But Cheese Sandwich pulled too quickly.

Passengers: Ahhh!

Cheese Sandwich's Driver: We need to be careful, Cheese Sandwich. You can bump changelings, but you can't bump passengers.

Cheese Sandwich: Sorry, me hearties.

Narrator: And Cheese Sandwich left the docks and headed out onto the branch line. It wasn't long before he realized he was enjoying himself.

Cheese Sandwich: Pulling passengers is quite a fun job.

Narrator: Soon, Cheese Sandwich was approaching his first stop, which was the Day Spa.

(Cheese Sandwich stops)

Narrator: But Cheese Sandwich stopped too quickly, and gave his passengers a bump.

Passengers: (Groaning)

Narrator: Every time Cheese Sandwich left a building, he pulled away too quickly. And every time he stopped at a building, he stopped too quickly. The passengers were having the bumpiest ride they'd ever had.

Big Daddy McColt: Oh, such a dreadful ride!

Narrator: When Cheese Sandwich reached Sugar Cube Corner, Hoity Toity was waiting for him.

Hoity Toity: Cheese Sandwich, I've been receiving complaints from passengers who were on your ride. You must be very careful when pulling passengers. They are not like trucks.

Cheese Sandwich: Yes, captain. I'm sorry, but I've never had much experience with buffaloess and thought they were easy to manage. I promise to more careful.

Narrator: As Cheese Sandwich turned around for his run back to Ponyville Docks, he met Fancy Pants.

Fancy Pants: Hello, Cheese Sandwich. How are things?

Cheese Sandwich: Not very well, Fancy Pants. I just had a bad time pulling passengers along the route.

Fancy Pants: What happened?

Cheese Sandwich: I kept bumping my passengers, and they complained to Hoity Toity. (Sighs) Some animals make pulling passengers seem easy, but I found out that it's a lot harder than I thought.

Fancy Pants: I can give you some advice if you want.

Cheese Sandwich: Yes, please, matey.

Fancy Pants: When you're leaving a building, you need to pull out slowly. You also need to stop slowly when you're approaching a building. If you're slow and steady you come in or leave a building, you won't bump your passengers.

Cheese Sandwich: Thank you, Fancy Pants. And now it's time my journey to Ponyville Docks.

Narrator: So Cheese Sandwich was re-hooked to his buffaloes. And when it was time to leave, Cheese Sandwich pulled slowly out of Sugar Cube Corner. And when Cheese Sandwich arrived at the marketplace, he stopped very slowly and came to a gentle stop.

Cheese Sandwich: Pulling passengers is not such a bad job after all, if you know how to be careful with them.

Narrator: And Cheese Sandwich reached Ponyville Docks without any incidents.

Cherry Fizzy: Hello, Cheese Sandwich. How was your journey?

Cheese Sandwich: It wasn't good at first, but after Fancy Pants gave me some advice, I was able to pull my buffaloes smoothly. I think I'm going to enjoy taking passengers very much this week.

Narrator: Cheese Sandwich kept taking passengers for a week. He still remembered what Fancy Pants said, and did his best to pull his buffaloes smoothly. A week later, Shining Armor returned from the works.

Shining Armor: Hello, Cheese Sandwich. I heard you've been taking buffaloes while I was gone.

Cheese Sandwich: Oh yes. I took passengers up and down your branch line. I had some trouble at first, but I did have some help from Fancy Pants. And now, I've gotten used to pulling passengers. But all the same, I would like to return to the docks and go back to what I do best.

Shining Armor: Well, I'm repaired now, so you can return to Ponyville Docks and I'll pull the buffaloes again.

Cheese Sandwich: Thanks, matey.

Narrator: So Cheese Sandwich returned to Ponyville Docks to arrange changelings with Cherry Fizzy.

Cherry Fizzy: We're glad to have you back, Cheese Sandiwch. The docks have been quite busy while you were gone.

Gustave: Cherry Fizzy's right. We've been so busy, we barely had time to rest.

Cheese Sandwich: Don't worry. I'll be able to help out again. Let's get to work, me hearties.

Narrator: Cheese Sandwich enjoyed his time taking passengers along Shining Armor's route, but he was glad to be doing his favorite job again; arranging changelings at Ponyville Docks.