List of characters in Master Chief Sucks at Ordering

This is a list of characters in Master Chief Sucks at Ordering, a Youtube series by UltraHyperShadow.

Master Chief
A rude, idiotic, unhelpful soldier with limited combat abilities. He has only one real friend, the Arbiter, who he is regularly annoying towards. He usually attempts to do the right thing, although in unusual ways and with varying levels of success.

The Arbiter
The more calm and level-headed friend of Master Chief. He is smarter and less obnoxious than Master Chief. He usually attempts to help his friend even though Master Chief is annoying, such as informing him that Scientology is evil or helping him triangulate the King's position. He is captured by Tom Cruise in the season 1 finale.

Barack Obama
Appears in the fourth minisode to help Master Chief. He is mentioned in the third minisode as having captured Scientologists, and that his weaknesses are John McCain and Hillary Clinton.

Cortana
She appears at the end of the final minisode to tell Master Chief he fulfills a prophecy to save the world.

Mario, Luigi, Link, and Samus
Four Nintendo characters recruited by Master Chief in the third episode. Samus has a cameo role in "Master Chief Sucks at Online Dating." Mario, Link, and Samus also appear (without Luigi) in the season finale, where they fight CATS and are captured.

Xenu
The archenemy of Scientology, Xenu is freed by the heroes in "Master Chief vs Scientology" and fights L. Ron Hubbard, but is killed.

Villains
Main article: The Network

The King
The leader of the group who is first mentioned at the end of "Master Chief Sucks at Making Videos." Finding him is the goal of the season finale, and Master Chief meets him at the end of the episode, where he reveals himself as the mascot of Burger King. He kills CATS, who he claims has outlived his usefulness. He is working on a doomsday device and captured Master Chief after their meeting in the finale. It is revealed he is affiliated with a shadow government called "the Network."

Jack Thompson
An anti-gaming attorney, Jack Thompson attempts to have Halo 3 banned and later attempts to take over Congress by cloning himself. He is the only original villain left alive at the end of season 1, after his clones successfully warded off an attack by Master Chief.

Tom Cruise
Introduced in the season 1 finale, Tom Cruise takes over Scientology after Hubbard's death and captures the Arbiter. In the minisodes, he places child porn on Master Chief's computer to get him arrested.

Chad Warden
A Playstation 3 fanboy, Chad Warden is recruited by the King in the first minisode because he hates the Xbox 360 and Halo.

The Angry Video Game Nerd
A retro game reviewer whose real name is James Rolfe, the Angry Video Game Nerd, or AVGN, is recruited by the King in the second minisode because he hates the Xbox 360 and because he can help build the King's doomsday device.

Chris Hansen
A personality from Dateline on NBC, Chris Hanson became famous for catching child predators on "To Catch a Predator." He confronts Master Chief in the third minisode after Tom Cruise framed him for child porn ownership. He is only a villain by association, as he has good intentions but is misled by the villains.

Hillary Clinton
A former Democratic presidential nominee beaten by Barack Obama. Her face is scarred and she wears makeup like the Joker from The Dark Knight. She is recruited to defeat Obama, but her annoyance at the villains' sexist behaviors make her strike out on her own, unaffiliated with them.

CATS
The main villain of season 1, CATS is a cyborg who regularly creates trouble for Master Chief, starting with him delaying Super Smash Bros. Brawl. After a climactic fight in the finale, he is suddenly shot by the King, his leader.

L. Ron Hubbard
The founder and leader of Scientology who supposedly died, but reveals himself to be alive when he attacks and kills Xenu. Master Chief subdues him, and he allies with CATS. Hubbard is killed in a swordfight with the Arbiter, and Tom Cruise takes his place.