Mr. Conductor Meets Ed, Edd 'n' Eddy

Based on the Mr. Conductor’s Adventure Movies and all those Mr. Conductor’s Adventure Series, Mr. Conductor Meets Ed, Edd n Eddy is a series featuring George Carlin as Mr. Conductor. Each episode will have 2 Thomas stories. Only Thomas stories from Seasons 1-7 can be used. No stories from Season 8-present allowed.

Minor Guest Stars

 * Schemer
 * Mr. Conductor (Ringo Starr)

Thomas Stories

 * Thomas Gets Tricked (The Ed-Touchables)
 * Edward Helps Out (Nagged To An Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * Percy Takes The Plunge (Pop Goes The Ed)
 * The Trouble With Mud (Over Your Ed)

Trivia

 * "Percy Takes The Plunge" is restored

Thomas Stories

 * Thomas Meets The Queen (Sir Ed-A-Lot)
 * A Big Day For Thomas

Quotes

 * Sarah: Bye Bye!
 * Eddy: Ed! Get me out!
 * (Mr. Conductor appears)
 * Mr. Conductor: You really like being a queen, don't you, Sarah?
 * Jimmy: AAAHHHH!!!!!! A little man!!!!!
 * Mr. Conductor: Relax, Jimmy. I am not going to hurt you. Let me properly introduce myself. Mr. Conductor at your service.
 * Jimmy: H-hi, Mr. Conductor. How did you know my name?
 * Mr. Conductor: My friends, the Eds told me about you.
 * Sarah: And me?
 * Mr. Conductor: Absolutely, and I have a friend named Thomas The Tank Engiine along with many others on the Island Of Sodor.
 * Jimmy: Ooh... I want to hear about him!
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, I heard the other day, Thomas had met the queen.
 * Jimmy: Thomas met the queen?!
 * Eddy: I bet that queen wasn't a spoiled brat like Sarah!
 * Sarah: I HEARD THAT, STUPID!
 * Eddy: (groans)
 * Sarah: Tell me and Prince Jimmy about the queen, Mr. Conductor.
 * Edd: Yes, please tell us about it, Mr. Conductor.
 * Mr. Conductor: Oh yes.... (Blows whistle and "Thomas Meets The Queen" begins)

Trivia

 * Some of the scenes come from the Shining Time Station episode, "Queen For A Day"

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Percy, James and the Fruitful Day (Who, What, Where, Ed!)
 * 2) Henry's Forest (Keeping up with the Eds)

Quote 1

 * Edd: That'll take weeks.


 * Eddy: Not with what I got. C'mon, Frankenstein.


 * Edd: Oh, Mr. Conductor. I could only say that whatever Eddy does, he makes things worse!


 * Mr. Conductor: Well, maybe Eddy will surprise you and everything will pan out. In fact, didn't it work out for Henry and his forest?


 * Edd: Henry's Forest? I've no memory of that.


 * Mr. Conductor: You mean I've never told you about Henry and his forest? How Sad (Blows Whistle and "Henry's Forest" begins)

Quote 2

 * Thomas: But What? We can't mend broken trees.


 * (then the steam filled up the screen returning us to Edd's backyard)


 * Edd: Mr. Conductor, why have you stopped? What's to become of the forest?


 * Mr. Conductor: I'm afraid it will have to wait. You and I should get to work on repairing the backyard.


 * Edd: Right-O!


 * Mr. Conductor: Well, shall we get to work?

Quote 3

 * Ed: Sarah's fine.


 * Mr. Conductor: You know Ed, you were just as concerned about Sarah the same way as Henry when a storm damaged his forest.


 * Ed: What happened?


 * Mr. Conductor: I'll tell you about it.


 * Eddy: Yeah yeah yeah, just hurry up and tell, I've got jawbreakers to buy.


 * Mr. Conductor: Patience Eddy, please. Now where was I... oh yes! Henry's Forest. (Blows whistle and continues telling "Henry's Forest")

Trivia

 * 2nd time a Thomas story is put in 2 parts. The 1st being was in "Mr. Conductor & Elmo saves Christmas"

Thomas Stories

 * 1) No Joke for James (Fool on the Ed)
 * 2) Tender Engines (A Boy and his Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Lady Hatt's Birthday Party (Alec Baldwin, In Like Ed)
 * 2) Thomas and Stepney (George Carlin, Who Let the Ed In?)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Sir Topham Hatt's Holiday (Alec Baldwin, Home Cooked Eds)
 * 2) Oliver Owns Up (George Carlin, Rambling Ed)

Quotes

 * Ed: I'm a cowboy! Bang Bang!
 * (Mr. Conductor appears in a cloud of gold dust)
 * Mr. Conductor: Hi Rolf. Everything going fine with the Eds?
 * Rolf: A Burden has been placed on Rolf.
 * Mr. Conductor: Sometimes it takes time to get used to having new company around. Take the story of Oliver-
 * Rolf: A Store of Olives? No thank you. I am not hungry.
 * Mr. Conductor: No, I mean the story of Oliver The Great Western Engine, when he was still new to The Island Of Sodor. Well, You can't take it unless I give it to you. Right? (Blows whistle and "Oliver Owns Up" begins)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Thomas, Percy and the Squeak (Alec Baldwin, To Sir with Ed)
 * 2) Wrong Road (George Carlin, Key to my Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Percy and the Haunted Mine (Alec Baldwin, Honor Thy Ed)
 * 2) Thomas Goes Fishing (George Carlin, Scrambled Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Double Trouble [S2] (Urban Ed)
 * 2) Duck Takes Charge (Stop, Look and Ed)

Quotes

 * Mr. Conductor: Well, Eddy, you've certainly spread the No Rules Rule word to the other kids.
 * Edd: At least you and I know best to follow rules and regulations, Mr. Conductor.
 * Eddy: Oh well, Looks like you guys will miss out on skating in the wet cement rink.
 * Mr. Conductor: You know, Eddy, rules and regulations have to be followed in order to keep us safe and in order. On the Island Of Sodor, there are many rules and regulations that must be obeyed, and when the engines forget that, things can go very wrong. Take the story of Duck's first workday on the Island Of Sodor.
 * Edd: I don't think we ever heard that one, Mr. Conductor.
 * Mr. Conductor: You mean I didn't tell you about when Duck first arrived? How sad. (Blows whistle and "Duck Takes Charge" begins)

Trivia

 * Schemer guest stars hosting his radio show again from "Is Anybody There?" as part of a City Attraction in "Urban Ed"

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Thomas Comes To Breakfast [told by George Carlin] (Rent A Ed)
 * 2) Bye George! [told by Alec Baldwin] (Shoo Ed)

Quotes
Quote 2
 * Mr. Conductor: Now think about this first, Eddy. After all, You and Ed have caused alot of damage today.
 * Eddy: Ah, What could happen?
 * Mr. Conductor: Well for one, You could end up as bad as Thomas. He didn't think and he had quite an accident. Well, Let me tell you about it. (Blows Whistle and "Thomas Comes To Breakfast" Begins)
 * Mr. Conductor: This plan of getting rid of Johnny from others sounds rather underhanded, Eddy. In fact, Johnny's just as big of a bother as George.
 * Edd: George? Would that be the one who failed to deliver the controller to his wife's party?
 * Mr. Conductor: Yes indeed. But I'm afraid he's caused the engines alot of trouble. (blows whistle and "Bye George!" begins)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Thomas and the Jet Engine (Ed in a Half Shell)
 * 2) A Better View for Gordon (Mirror, Mirror on the Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Special Attraction (George Carlin, Hot Buttered Ed)
 * 2) Emily's New Coaches (Michael Angelis, High Heeled Ed)

Quote 1

 * Mr. Conductor: You know Eddy, being angry that Kevin took your spot doesn't always fix the problem. Bulstrode was acting the same way with the freight cars until he was taught a lesson.


 * Eddy: Who the heck is Bulstrode?!


 * Edd: And what kind of name is Bulstrode, Mr. Conductor? I've never known somebody named Bulstrode.


 * Mr. Conductor: He's a very impatient and ill-tempered barge. Percy soon found that out for himself. I'll tell you about it.


 * Edd: And PLEASE Mr. Conductor, make it quick! I must find more sunscreen!


 * Mr. Conductor: Patience, Edd. Just try to calm down. Now where was I? (Blows Whistle and "Special Attraction" Begins)

Quote 2

 * (Mr. Conductor's Cousin Appears)


 * Mr. Conductor: Hello, Jimmy.


 * (Jimmy screams)


 * Jimmy: Who are you?!


 * Mr. Conductor: Relax, Jimmy. I'm not going to hurt you. Allow me to properly introduce myself. My name is Ringo but you may call me Mr. Conductor.


 * Jimmy: I have a friend named Mr. Conductor, too!


 * Mr. Conductor: Well, he is my cousin. He went go-karting with your other lads. Unfortunately, he has to watch the lads race together because he is much too short to drive.


 * Jimmy: Mr. Conductor, why do you have a butterfly net?


 * Mr. Conductor: I'm going to catch some butterflies. And by the way, you get along with Sarah and Nazz very well. My friend Thomas most recently got along with his new friend Emily.


 * Jimmy: Gee wilikers, Mr. C! Who is Emily?


 * Mr. C: She is a very beautiful engine. I'll tell you about her. And by the way, Jimmy, never beat a golden monarch butterfly in a game of cards. They get angry! (Blows Whistle and "Emily's New Coaches" begins)

Trivia

 * Mr. Conductor (Ringo Starr) guest stars in "High Heeled Ed".

Notes:

 * Thomas stories told by George Carlin and Alec Baldwin

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Percy's Ghostly Trick (George Carlin, An Ed in the Bush)
 * 2) Stepney Gets Lost (Alec Baldwin, See No Ed)

Notes:

 * Thomas Stories told by George Carlin

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Trust Thomas (Is There an Ed in the House?)
 * 2) A Proud Day for James (An Ed is Born)

Quotes

 * (Mr. Conductor appears)
 * Edd: Why, Mr. Conductor, We've just learned Sarah's sick. Would you know any good remedies?
 * Mr. Conductor: I think I know a few, but she isn't the only one. I'm feeling a little under the weather myself.
 * Edd: Sorry to hear, Mr. Conductor.
 * Ed: Are the others on Sodor all right, Mr. C?
 * Eddy(to Ed): Did you have to ask?
 * Mr. Conductor: Let's see...Some are doing good, pretty good, very good and awful.
 * Edd: I'm afraid you'll have to explain better than that.
 * Mr. Conductor: Explain what?
 * Edd: Who's feeling how well, Mr. Conductor?
 * Mr. Conductor: Well that's what I've been trying to do. Thomas was having a good day, but Bertie wasn't having a good day at all. Well...Let me tell you about it. (blows whistle and "Trust Thomas" begins)

Trivia

 * This is the Season 3 Finale

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Train Stops Play
 * 2) Bowled Out

Trivia

 * This is the 1st episode of Season 4

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Edward's Exploit (George Carlin, Don't Rain on my Ed)
 * 2) Make Someone Happy (Alec Baldwin, Once Bitten, Twice Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) The Flying Kipper (George Carlin, One Size Fits Ed)
 * 2) Faulty Whistles (Alec Baldwin, Pain in the Ed)

Notes:

 * Thomas stories told by George Carlin and Alec Baldwin

Thomas Stories:

 * 1) Harvey to the Rescue (Alec Baldwin, Ed Overboard)
 * 2) Come Out, Henry! (George Carlin, One of Those Eds)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Tenders and Turntables (They Call Him Mr. Ed)
 * 2) Old Iron (For the Ed, by the Ed)

Quote 1

 * Mr. Conductor: Eddy, you've got quite a staff working here.
 * Eddy: Just you wait, Mr. C. I'll be beyond up from here.
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, I wouldn't get too confident.
 * Eddy: Why?
 * Mr. Conductor: You see running a company is hard work and if the other kids aren't shown appreciation for it, a lot can go wrong. As for what can go wrong, I have to say, the big engines on the Island of Sodor have really had their share. Let me show you what I mean. (Blows whistle and "Tenders and Turntables" begins)

Quote 2

 * Mr. Conductor: Wow! I didn't know Election Day came so early. What is this election for? I'll be pleased to vote.
 * Edd: King of the Cul-De-Sac, Mr. Conductor.
 * Eddy: Yeah! And I'm gonna win this Election and rub it in Baldy and that useless hunk of wood's faces
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, Eddy, you shouldn't expect what you believe is gonna happen.
 * Eddy: What makes you think that I'm not gonna win, "Mr. Confrontor"?
 * Mr. Conductor: Well for one, Boasting is never good and being doubtful about another sometimes leads them to despair whereas the other benefits. James was doubtful about Edward until he pulled through and saved him.
 * Edd: My. How brave and heroic.
 * Eddy: Yeah right. I'll believe it when I see it.
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, then let me start on the start and begin at the beginning. (Blows whistle and "Old Iron" begins)

Trivia

 * Schemer guest stars in "For the Ed, by the Ed"

Notes:

 * Thomas Stories told by George Carlin

Thomas Stories

 * 1) A Bad Day for Sir Handel (Little Ed Blue)
 * 2) Four Little Engines (A Twist of Ed)

Quote 1

 * Ed: SHUT UP!!!!
 * Eddy: You shut up!!!!
 * Edd: Please! Ed's having a bad day!
 * Mr. Conductor: Edd's right, Eddy. Ed must've been tired or cranky.
 * Edd: After all, Mr. C, Ed did kick everyone out of the house and bellowed at Sarah. I didn't think that Ed 'would' do such a thing like that to his little sister.
 * Eddy: Probably cause she whines at him too much!
 * Mr. Conductor: Oh, I don't think that's the case. Sometimes people don't like to be bothered. Even the engines on the Island Of Sodor don't like to be bothered. Do you know who Ed's reminding me of now, that silly snob of an engine, Sir Handel!
 * Eddy: Did he kick people out and scream at them too?!
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, let me tell you what happened, and then you will find out. (Blows whistle and "A Bad Day for Sir Handel" begins)

Quote 2

 * Mr. Conductor: Let go! I mean it, Robin! Give it back right now! Thank you! Honestly, you're starting to become a real pest!
 * Edd: At least the Kankers haven't caused you any grief or displeasure, Mr. Conductor.
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, I have a pest, myself. Mr. Robin wants to take every snack out my hand like this cookie I was going to give to the squirrels.
 * Edd: I think that Mr. Robin is just of a pest as the Kanker Sisters.
 * Mr. Conductor: You're right, Edd. I think Mr. Robin and the Kankers are so badly behaved that I think they are no better than coaches! If you know what I mean. (Whistle sounds and "Four Little Engines" begins)

Trivia

 * In "A Twist Of Ed" Mr. Conductor does not use his whistle.
 * One of the scenes come from "Wildlife". (Mr. C's Thomas Tales)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Middle Engine (Alec Baldwin, Your Ed Here)
 * 2) Sleeping Beauty (George Carlin, The Good Ol' Ed)

Quotes

 * Mr. Conductor: Hi, guys, what's up?
 * Edd: Why, we're building our time capsules, Mr. Conductor.
 * Mr. Conductor: Sounds interesting. Time Capsules hold some great surprises in future. Who knows who will discover it and what use they'll make of it? Speaking of surprises and discovery, You guys remember the story about Duke?
 * Eddy: You mean that old coot of a train you told from when we were stuck in Johnny's wall? BLECH! I can still taste Kanker lip!
 * Mr. Conductor: Yes. He was trapped in his shed where the trees and bushes grew around.
 * Edd: I believe I remember that somber story before, Mr. Conductor.
 * Mr. Conductor: Yes, but I'm afraid you didn't hear what happened the other day on the Island Of Sodor.
 * Ed: Ooh! Did Thomas run into a car of gravy?!
 * Eddy: Did Gordon fall into another ditch?
 * Edd: Oh, dear....
 * Mr. Conductor: Don't mind them. Let me-- no, I'll let Thomas remind you of that story so far.  (Blows whistle and "Sleeping Beauty" begins)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) A Scarf for Percy (George Carlin, Thick as an Ed)
 * 2) The Fogman (Alec Baldwin, Sorry, Wrong Ed)

Quotes

 * Mr. Conductor: Ed's jacket dilemma is getting in the way of the scam, but it can't be as bad as what happened to Percy on the Island Of Sodor.
 * Eddy: I'll bet he wasn't dealing with stinky cheese and jackets!
 * Mr. Conductor: No, but he got into quite of a jam you might say. Come along and I'll tell you about it. (Blows whistle and "A Scarf For Percy" begins)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) A Friend in Need (Alec Baldwin, Robbin' Ed)
 * 2) What's the Matter with Henry? (Michael Brandon, A Case of Ed)

Quotes

 * Ed: I'm turning into a werewolf Eddy!
 * Mr. Conductor: I feel very sorry for you, Edd.
 * Edd: Oh, Mr. Conductor. Ed and Eddy don't seem to care about me feeling this way. They just make fun of Kevin instead of taking me to a doctor. (cries)
 * Mr. Conductor: Aw, I understand Edd. Thomas and Percy were acting the same way towards Henry The Big Green Engine when he was feeling under the weather.
 * Edd: Did Henry have the same disease like me?
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, let me tell you about it. (Blows whistle and "What's The Matter With Henry" begins)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Bulldog (George Carlin, Run for your Ed)
 * 2) Double Teething Troubles (Alec Baldwin, Hand me Down Ed)

Quotes
Quote 2
 * (Mr. Conductor appears)
 * Mr. Conductor: Oh, this is terrible! Truly terrible!
 * Edd: What appears to be the trouble, Mr. Conductor?
 * Mr. Conductor: I was playing music on my whistle when a boomerang flew by and knocked it out of my hand.
 * Edd: That wouldn't be the same one here on the ground would it?
 * Mr. Conductor: Yes! I recognize it!
 * Edd: Well, it appears to look fine to me.
 * Mr. Conductor: Oh? Well, hear this. (blows whistle sounding off tune) Sounds funny to me. Doesn't it sound funny to you?
 * Mr. Conductor: That boomerang is certainly causing a lot of trouble around here.
 * Eddy: Tell me about it, Mr. C. It turned Rolf into a loudmouth singer, made Sarah act nice, messed up your whistle, who else could be next?!!!!
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, I bet it could help out the diesel who was brought to help Bill and Ben. He had teething troubles you know.
 * Edd: What diesel was this, Mr. Conductor?
 * Eddy: And what the heck are teething troubles?
 * Ed: Is it when your teeth act up?
 * Mr. Conductor: Well, Let me tell you guys about it. (blows whistle still sounding off tune and "Double Teething Troubles" begins)

Trivia

 * In "Hand Me Down Ed" instead of the boomerang changing Mr. Conductor's personality, it knocks his whistle out of his hand and makes it sound off tune.

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Trouble in the Shed (Stiff Upper Ed)
 * 2) Donald's Duck (Here's Mud in your Ed)

Quote 1

 * (Mr. Conductor Appears)


 * Mr. Conductor: What's the matter, Jimmy? You're crying a river of tears.


 * Jimmy: Oh, Mr. Conductor! You're not going to believe it! The Eds tricked me out of my money! (cries loudly)


 * Mr. Conductor: Calm down, Jimmy, Everything's going to be okay. I think the time has come for Eddy to be given a taste of trickery himself!


 * Jimmy: But how, Mr. C? What would Thomas and his friends say to something like this?


 * Mr. Conductor: Now there's a thought. Did I ever tell you about Donald's Duck?


 * Jimmy: Donald's Duck?


 * Mr. Conductor: Now there's a story about trickery if there ever was one. I'll tell you the story now. It might help us think of a tricky idea. (Blows whistle and "Donald's Duck" begins)


 * (Story ends)


 * Jimmy: So they did trick Donald with a duck! But what can I use?


 * Mr. Conductor: Well, you can't use a duck.

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Time for Trouble (Stuck in Ed)
 * 2) Bulgy (Postcards from the Ed)

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Henry's Special Coal (George Carlin)
 * 2) Edward the Really Useful Engine (Alec Baldwin)

Quotes

 * Mr. Conductor (Alec Baldwin): Cheer up, Eddy. Being old doesn't have to be all bad. A lesson Gordon learned when Edward proved himself.
 * Eddy: You mean you tell Thomas stories too?
 * Mr. Conductor (Alec Baldwin): Yes. Would you like to hear it?
 * Eddy: Well, alright.
 * Mr. Conductor (Alec Baldwin): Sparkle Sparkle Sparkle! (blows whistle and "Edward the Really Useful Engine" begins)

Trivia

 * This is the Season 4 Finale
 * In Eddy's dream where he and the others are old, he first meets Mr. Conductor (Alec Baldwin) who tells Eddy he filled in for his cousin when he retired from Shining Time Station years ago.

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Snow
 * 2) Jack Frost

Trivia

 * Even though Alec Baldwin tells both stories, George Carlin blows his whistle to start the stories

Goofs

 * In the credits when it shows what episodes the Shining Time Station clips were from, Achoo wasn't listed.

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Thomas, Percy and the Mail Train
 * 2) Rock 'n' Roll

Trivia

 * Throughout the episode Mr. Conductor doesn't get affected by Cupid Sarah & Cupid Jimmy's love arrows & helped Rolf out to stop them

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Toby's Discovery
 * 2) Haunted Henry

Trivia

 * Even though Alec Baldwin tells both stories, George Carlin blows his whistle to start the stories

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Henry to the Rescue (George Carlin, Mission Ed-Possible)
 * 2) Toby's Windmill (Michael Brandon, Every Which Way but Ed)

Trivia

 * This is the 1st episode of Season 5

Thomas Stories

 * 1) Edward, Trevor and the Really Useful Party (May I Have this Ed?)
 * 2) Terence the Tractor (Look Before you Ed)

Trivia

 * This is the 1st episode of Season 6 as well as the season finale, but the finale to the series is "Mr. Conductor's Adventures in Ed Edd n Eddy's Big Picture Show"