Sesame Street/Why Can't We Be Friends (from The Muppet Show)

Cast

 * Big Bird as Kermit the Frog
 * Biff as Beauregard
 * Harvey Kneeslapper as Crazy Harry
 * Noel Cowherd as Slim Wilson
 * Forgetful Jones as Zeke
 * Little Chrissy and the Alphabeats as American Civil War Soldiers
 * Harvey Monster and Maurice Monster as Romans
 * Cyranose de Bergerac and Pierre (Anything Muppet) as Musketeers of the Guard
 * Don Music, Fenwick and Bill Smith as Imperial Russian Army Soldiers
 * Joey and Davey Monkey as Native Americans
 * Chip and Dip as First French Empire Soldiers
 * Monty, Kermit the Forg and Big Jeffy as World War I Soldiers
 * Buster the Horse as Horse
 * Bert as Statler
 * Ernie as Waldorf

Lyrics
(Main stage. Enter Big Bird .)

Big Bird: Thank you, thank you, thank you, and welcome again to The Sesame Street Muppet Show! It is going to be a terrific show tonight because our guest star is one of the great talents of the music world, Mr. Jerry. And because Jerry is such an outdoors lover, we're going to spend a lot of the show in the country.

( Biff peers from behind the curtain.)

Biff: Big Bird, Big Bird, Sully and I haven't quite finished building the set yet.

Big Bird: Well, uh, how much time do you guys need?

Biff: Thursday?

Big Bird: Uh, Biff, we have to do the number now!

Biff: Well okay, but it looks like a battlefield back there.

Big Bird: It's supposed to.

Biff: Oh. Then it's finished.

Big Bird: Uh, ladies and gentlemen, our opening number!

Little Chrissy and the Alpha beats : La la la la la, la la la la la, Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends

Chip: We just can't wait until the war begin.

Dip: It gave you death until you lead.

Chip and Dip: Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends We can't we be friends

Monty: It never happens in the what's it for.

Kermit the Forg: Gonna sleep for forty winks without a war.

Monty and Kermit the Forg : Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends We can't we be friends

Forgetful Jones: Why don't we drop our guns and all shake hands?

Big Jeffy: Forget the war. Make some other plans.

Everyone: Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends We're getting tired and our feet are sore Let's head for home an say to heck with war! Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends Why can't we be friends

(At the end, Bert and Ernie fire at the fighters with a machine gun, and they collectively surrender.)

Everyone: Friends!

Ernie: They got up. We must have missed them.

Bert: We didn't miss them, we were shooting blanks.

Ernie: We were?

Bert: Of course!

( Bert accidentally fires another round, reaching the ceiling.)

Bert: Well, some of them were blanks.

Ernie: (laughing)

(The cast of the opening number passes by Big Bird .)

Big Bird: Okay, nice opening number.

Joey Monkey: Oh, thank you very much, sir.

Big Bird: Okay, soldiers, nicely waged.