The Devious D10 Gang

In the scrapyards, two diesels named Splatter and Dodge were hiding in a siding. They were there ever since they betrayed Diesel 10. One day, Sir Topham Hatt found them.

Sir Topham Hatt: Hello. What are you two doing here?

Splatter: Sir, here's what happened.

Dodge: While you were away, sir...

Sir Topham Hatt: I see. I'll let you go to the Other Railway. Two diesel will be members of my team.

Splatter and Dodge: Thank you, sir!

Soon, Splatter and Dodge were away while two diesels came. They were painted to dark green with yellow cabs and yellow and black hazard stripes. They were also named Iron Arry and Iron Bert.

One day while shunting, they met Diesel.

Diesel: Who are you!

Arry: I'm Arry, and he's Bert!

Bert: We are called Arry and Bert.

Arry: We want to be devious like you!

Diesel: All right - here's what you do...

And soon, Arry and Bert were now villainous, wicked diesels like Diesel. One day, not long afterwards, Diesel 10 returned to Sodor. When he arrived at the scrapyards, Arry ad Bert welcomed him.

Arry: It's the boss! Remember us?

Diesel 10: No, not really. I never seen you two before.

Bert: Back then, I am called Bert, and he was Arry and you call us "Barry"....

Diesel 10: Oh, yes! And you're now...?

Arry: It's Arry.

Bert: And Bert!

Diesel 10: Good! I'll call you "Barry" from then on! Spelled with an "a".

Soon Diesel 10 met Diesel, and the four of them became the "Devious Diesel 10 Gang". Now, it was time for mass destruction to steam engines!

One afternoon, Gordon was pulling the express. It is called the "Wild 'nor Wester", and full of people from England, Wales, and Scotland. In his cab, Bubs was at controls, and Coach Z was shoveling coal. It was nice until Bubs looked back and saw Diesel 10.

Bubs: Coach? Does the railway own a large brownish yellow warship diesel with a large claw on top?

Coach Z: No. Not one that I know of. Why’d you ask?

Bubs: Because there’s one following us!!

Gordon looked back, and was horrified!

Gordon: Quick! Run away!

The coaches behind them swayed and lurched as Diesel 10 pulled alongside. The large grabber on top of the diesel snapped and lifted from its stand. Bubs and Coach Z watched in total horror as Diesel 10 pulled ahead and began smashing Gordon with his claw!

Gordon: OWW! Stop that! Get away!

Bubs ran to the controls and reduced the engine’s speed. Coach Z grabbed his shovel and tried to hit Diesel 10 with it! But the shovel only managed to smash one of his tinted windows. The claw snapped and then dropped back on top of Diesel 10. He sped away into the distance. Bubs jumped down from the cab when the engine stopped and he ran to the boiler.

Bubs: Sir Topham Hatt isn’t going to like this.

Gordon: Tell me about it! My boiler's all dented thanks to that bloody diesel!

Bubs: This is bad... {Coach Z runs out of the first coach, followed by a stream of passengers.}

Passenger #1: What’s happened!

Passenger #2: Oh, like you haven’t noticed! That great bloody diesel smashed Gordon!

Coach Z: Okay! Has anyone got a mobile phone? {He notices a man who has a very nice and long calling mobile phone.}

This man is Jeremiah Jobling. He had given his leather bootlaces to Strong Bad and Pom-Pom when James made a hole in a coach break pipe. He was a very short-tempered man and he was in no mood to give up his mobile! Coach Z walked up to him.

Coach Z: 'cuse me, but I need to borrow your mobile phone.

Jeremiah Jobling: You won't!

Coach Z: Then it's a long walk for the passengers then.

Everyone told Coach Z and Bubs what a bad engine crew they were, and then they told Jeremiah Jobling what a bad man he was instead. Everyone was cross. Eventually, he gave his mobile phone to Coach Z, who called Sir Topham Hatt.

Sir Topham Hatt: Hello? Sodor Railways manager Sir Charles Topham Hatt here. How may I help you?

Coach Z: Hi, Sir!

Sir Topham Hatt: Hello, Coach Z. What’s the problem?

Coach Z: It’s a bit complicated - we were on the main line with the express and then some Warship diesel with a quarry claw on top, pulled along side Gordon and smashed the boiler in!

Sir Topham Hatt: Well, you’re going to have to get the train to Crewe. There’s nothing we can do at Crovan’s gate. It’s closed until that fire damage has been cleared up.

Coach Z: But the bridge is barricaded by the other railway, Sir!

Sir Topham Hatt: Emily is nearby with a ballast train. We can get some more ballast.

Coach Z: What do you mean?

Sir Topham Hatt: Well, the bridge is barricaded, there’s Gordon that needs fixing, a West End show arriving tomorrow by boat and a load of passengers who’ll want their money back if they don’t get back into Tidmouth on time. You’re going to break through the barricade of course!!! {Coach Z gasps in horror.} Well the engine already needs repairs so why not get our money’s worth?

Coach Z: Okay, Sir. Bye. {hands the phone back to Jeremiah Jobling} Would everyone please embark the coaches again. This express is now a non stop to Crewe.

The passengers thought about what Coach Z had said. Ready to complain, but then they thought about what the two friends had been through already. Gordon was wrecked, they had survived a war and they were now ready to explode with anxiousness.

Soon, they boarded the coaches, and the pistons raised steam again. The inevitable wheel spin begun and stopped quickly. Gordon picked up speed and away to meet Emily at the Arlesdale junction. This would be the scariest moment of Bubs and Coach Z's lives....

Gordon thundered down the line. His boiler was dented but he was still going for gold! Bubs and Coach Z were inside the cab trying to control the engine’s immense power. As they reached the Arlesdale junction, another Emily joined them. Inside her cab were Wendy Testaburger, and her best friend Bebe Stevens.

Emily: Gordon, what happened to you?

Gordon: Long story.

Wendy Testaburger: Looks like both the engines are going to need a fix up after this!

Bebe Stevens: Lets give the buggers a run for their money!!

Soon, Gordon and Emily (with Bubs, Coach Z, Wendy, and Bebe in their cabs) approached the bridge block, and unfortunately, Diesel, Arry and Bert were there.

Emily: WHAT THE CRAP?!

Gordon: We've been blocked!

Wendy Testaburger: Oh, great! Just f**king great! Those boxes on wheels are onto us!

Emily: No! I'll get us through! {increases speed}

Wendy Testaburger: Emily, what are you doing?! You'll get hurt!

Emily: That's what you think!

Emily increased speed, and Diesel and Arry were knocked off the rails. Gordon followed, but the bridge did not collapse. When Diesel 10 found out, he was not very happy.

Diesel 10: You idiots!

Later that night, in Norramby, the Runner family was getting ready for bed. Homestar Runner Jr., (who was named for his father) was at his model layout made by himself, Homeschool, and Homestar. His favorite region of British Railways was the LNER, and had a number of Hornby North Eastern engine models. He and Palm Palm (Pom-Pom's son) were Thomas' engine crew.

When they were asleep, Diesel 10 crept up on the small house. Homestar Jr., had just drank some water, when he heard a crash.

Homestar Jr.: Who's there?! {runs downstairs, his family following}

{Diesel 10 rams his claw into the kitchen.}

Homestar: Diesel 10's back again!

Homezipan: {shrieks} Mom, do something!

Marzipan: What do you want!

Diesel 10: Hello, twinkle toes! I've got a plan, and you're not in it!

Homestar Jr.: You can't catch us, Diesel! {runs off to the kitchen}

Diesel 10: Running away, huh? Perfect timing! Where's that blue puffball!

Marzipan: You won't find him here!

Diesel 10: You're not clever enough to stop me!

Marzipan: Yes we are!

Diesel 10: No you're not! {Homestar Jr. runs back and produces a bag of sugar.} AUUGH! Is that?!

Homestar Jr.: That's right! It's sugar, Diesel! And if I fill this in your tank it'll seize you up for good!

Diesel 10: {as he reverses} Make the most of tonight, because you won't like tomorrow! Neither will that line of tin kettles! {claw snaps} Shut up, Pinchy...

{Homestar Jr. lowers the bag of sugar, and looks at his family.}

Homestar Jr.: What was that all about?

Marzipan: I think he means business. Diesel 10's back, and looking for revenge.

Homestar Jr.: Oh, no! Thomas! I must protect him at all costs!

Next morning, it was more peaceful. Percy was preparing for his morning mail route, with Stan Marsh and Kyle Broflovski in his cab.

Kyle Broflovski: Stan? Are you okay?

Stan Marsh: No, didn't sleep well last night. That heavy metal monster with a claw tried to kill my family!

Kyle Broflovski: Mine too.

Just then, Diesel, Arry, and Bert idled up along Percy.

Stan Marsh: Uh, oh. This is not good.

Diesel: So, Percy, you're not going to be around for much longer.

Percy: Why?

Arry: Steam is superior to diesels! We're taking over your work!

Bert: I'm taking the mail today! {He steals Percy's mail vans.}

Kyle Broflovski: HEY! You thief! Come back here!

Diesel: Sorry, Jew boy! You'll be driving us from now on!

Kyle Broflovski: {growls and clenches his fists angrily}

Diesel: See you in scrap! Heh heh!

Percy: Ooh, wait till I get my wheels on them!

Later that day, Thomas and Percy were at Elsbridge station. Homestar Jr., Palm Palm, Stan, and Kyle were talking. Homestar Jr. showing most concerns.

Homestar Jr.: Mark my words! If diesels are the trains we have to operate now, it'll be the end of steam on Sodor as we know it!

Thomas: Percy, things are not going to end well.

Percy: What'll become of us now?

Suddenly, they heard four horns behind them. It was Diesel 10, Diesel, Arry, and Bert, chasing them!

Diesel 10: Aha! The blue and green puffballs! Come destroy!

Homestar Jr.: Oh no! Hurry!

Homestar Jr. and Palm Palm scrambled into Thomas' cab, and Stan and Kyle hopped in Percy's. They opened the regulators and ran off. The chase was on!

Diesel 10: Now, I'll get you, twinkle toes! And that engine too!

Homestar Jr.: No you won't! Because the magic you refuse to believe in will get the better of you!

Diesel 10: {laughs evilly} Pinchy's hungry!

Stan Marsh: Auugh! Get back!

Percy increased speed, catching up with Thomas. They came to a viaduct. Homestar Jr. had a plan.

Homestar Jr.: Stan! Kyle!

Kyle Broflovski: Yeah!

Homestar Jr.: I got a plan! I've an emergency flare in my emergency kit! I'll throw it when Thomas and I've passed the middle arch, and it'll make a gap! But be quick when jumping the gap!

Percy: What?!

Thomas passed the middle arch, and Homestar Jr. threw the flare at it! The flare exploded, leaving a gap underneath the left most track. Percy jumped it, making a huge gap. As Diesel 10 neared, he slammed on his brakes!

Diesel 10: Phew! {Diesel, Arry, and Bert ram into him, and he falls into a barge filled with sludge.} NOT AGAIN!!! UGH! {sighs} Oh, well. Nice time of the year for a cruise. {laughs, not-so-evilly}

When Sir Topham Hatt found out about the diesel's deed, he punished them by working in the smelters for two months. Then he praised Homestar Jr. for his brave actions.

Sir Topham Hatt: Homestar Runner Jr., you and I both know that you're a sterling member of your family. You've stopped Diesel 10, despite throwing a flare!

Homestar Jr.: I'm sorry, sir! I was just-

Sir Topham Hatt: It's all right! Repairs are underway, and you're now promoted as driver of Thomas.

Homestar Jr. smiled. It was the proudest moment in his life. As for Diesel 10, he returned somehow. He's now at the smelters, constantly thinking of ways to get back at the steam engines for playing tricks on him, but I don't think he'll be doing that any time soon, do you?

THE END