Sesame Street Crayons/Mack the Knife (from The Muppet Show)

Cast

 * Oscar Grouchy Green as Dr. Teeth
 * Ernie Clear Sky Blue as Sam the Eagle

Lyrics
( Oscar Grouchy Green plays "Mack the Knife.")

Oscar Grouchy Green: Oh, the shark has pretty teeth, dear And he shows them pearly white Just a jackknife has MacHeath, dear And he keeps it outta sight

( Ernie Clear Sky Blue enters, reads some of the sheet music and stops the song.)

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: Stop, stop! Stop, stop, stop! This is an appalling song of gore and violence.

Oscar Grouchy Green: Well, uh, maybe you just don't understand it, Ernie Clear Sky Blue. It contains a lotta slang.

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: Hm. "A shark has pearly teeth dear" is slang?

Oscar Grouchy Green: Eh, sure. Uh, "shark" is a term for man. Everybody knows that "teeth" is slang for money. (laughs)

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: Wh-uh...wh-wh-wh...what about that "jackknife" here, hmm, hmm?

Oscar Grouchy Green: Uh, uh...Cockney rhyming slang!

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: ...what?

Oscar Grouchy Green: Jackknife, wife.

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: W-wh, all right, all right. But, "when the shark bites with his teeth, dear, scarlet billows start to spread?" Hmm? Hmm? Hmm? Hmm?

Oscar Grouchy Green: Let's see, uh..."biting" obviously means buying something. Scarlet billows...sofa pillows!

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: ...so, the song, then, is about a man who has a wife for whom he buys...pillows.

Oscar Grouchy Green: Exactly.

( Oscar Grouchy Green resumes the song, as Ernie Clear Sky Blue attempts to grove along.)

Oscar Grouchy Green: On the sidewalk, Sunday morning Lies a body oozin' life Someone's sneakin' 'round the corner Is that someone Mack the Knife?!

Ernie Clear Sky Blue: I don't fully grasp it, but, I'm sure it's a lovely sentiment.

( Oscar Grouchy Green finishes playing and laughs as Ernie Clear Sky Blue exits.)