Christmas Specials/Cheeseburger in Paradise (by Jimmy Buffett)

Cast

 * Floyd Pepper (from A Muppet Family Christmas) as Jimmy Buffett

Lyrics
Floyd Pepper: Tried to amend my carnivorous habits. Made it nearly seventy days, Losin' weight without speed, Eatin' sunflower seeds, Drinkin' lots of carrot juice and soakin' up rays.

But at night I'd have these wonderful dreams Some kind of sensuous treat. Not zucchini, fettuccini, or bulgur wheat, But a big warm bun and a huge hunk of meat.

Cheeseburger in paradise. Heaven on earth with an onion slice. Not too particular, not too precise. I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise.

Heard about the old-time sailor men, They eat the same thing again and again; "Warm beer and bread," they say, "could raise the dead." Well, it reminds me of the menu at a Holiday Inn.

But times have changed for sailors these days. When I'm in port I get what I need; Not just Havanas or bananas, or daiquiris, But that American creation on which I feed!

Cheeseburger in paradise Medium rare with mustard'd be nice Heaven on Earth with an onion slice I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise.

I like mine with lettuce and tomato Heinz 57 and French fried potatoes Big kosher pickle and a cold draught beer Well, good god almighty, which way do I steer...

...for my cheeseburger in paradise? Makin' the best of every virtue and vice. Worth every damn bit of sacrifice To get a cheeseburger in paradise. To be a cheeseburger in paradise. I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise.

I like mine with lettuce and tomato Heinz 57 and French fried potatoes Big kosher pickle and a cold draught beer Well, good god almighty, which way do I steer?