The Pie Adventure

The Pie Adventure is an excellent story that YOU MUST READ!

Story
The story begins at the birthday party of Jack de la Pieface, Royal Ambassador, King, Prime Minister AND President of France. Only the richest and poshest people are invited to this party...which doesn't really explain why a hobo, a chav, and a hippie are the first guests the reader learns about. Anyway, Jack decides the party needs a little 'oomph', so he makes the world's nicest pie. Everyone gets a slice, but there's one slice left! As everyone begins to fight over it (and the chav is killed), Jack makes a tournament for the pie.

Sylvester Gallstone beats Bruiser Knucklehead in a boxing match because Knucklehead knocks himself out, confused by Jack's French language. In the next match John Cena faces the hobo in a classic Cena match, with Cena hitting his Five Moves of Doom and only losing because loads of people attacked him. Zidane (FF9) is beaten next, in a football match against Christiano Ronaldhino. Jack then reveals that losers get shot, and kills Zidane mercilessly.

As Bruiser Knucklehead tries to defend himself, Jack speaks French to confuse him before shooting him. John Cena is made of tougher stuff, and takes several shots to be killed despite them all being in fatal places. Sca-REAM is defeated next, beaten in a fight against Roland the Magic Mage before being shot.